Page 14 - The Gluckman Occasional Number Three

One day the Seven Sisters realized they had burned up almost the
entire palace. The smoke had obscured their view, and they were
having too much fun. Oh, dear, they said to each other; we have
nothing left to burn except Snowed Quite’s tower. So they kissed her
goodbye. She almost woke up. Too bad! She never knew she had
become the hottest one of all.

Goldinsacks and the Stern Bears

Goldinsacks was walking down Wall Street one day, wondering
how she could get a really big bonus, when she spotted a brokerage
with an open door. Sensing an opportunity, she took the elevator to
the executive suite. But the managing directors were all out at
expense account lunches. She went into a fancy meeting room and
found a table with three piles of loan applications. After looking at
the first one, she thought: “interest rate is way too high, those idiots
won’t qualify.” Then at the second one: “interest rate is way too low;
those lenders can’t be squeezed for dough.” The third: “Now, these
look nice and fair; it’s exactly what the market can bear.” So she
ripped up the third pile and mixed up the terms on the other two so
they all became adjustable with a teaser rate the buyer could qualify
for if the underwriters looked the other way. When she heard the
executives coming back, she hid behind a potted palm.