Page 46 - Relationships101 A Guide To Building Healthy Relationships Final 1

When it comes to navigating the challenges that come with two people becoming one mind,
here is one example of how knowing who you are and who your partner is will turn out to
be valuable.

Perhaps you are a natural early bird, and your partner is a night owl. You look forward to
cuddling with your mate each night, but you have a sleep pattern where you go to bed early
and need quiet and darkness in order to go to sleep. Your partner, on the other hand, may
need to watch TV in order to fall asleep. Over time, this little difference can quickly become
irritating when one or both of you end up having a hard time staying awake at work because
you are not resting well.

Waking up tired each morning and having to work through the day fatigued because your
partner’s sleep habits keep you up can be taxing after a while. Also, some people maintain a
particular sleep pattern throughout their life. Changing it could create anxiety, causing one
to resist making changes because they feel like they are being forced to change because of
someone else’s problem.

Having contrasting sleep patterns is one example of the various types of unforeseen issues
that can arise in a relationship. In an intimate relationship, two people are working together
to become one unit. This requires each person to have a sense or intimate knowledge of
what they like and dislike and what they are willing to compromise to find a middle ground
when dealing with issues.

As you mature over time, you change, so you will need to have knowledge of who you are
at each stage of your life. This knowledge of self equips you to make sound decisions that
are in your best interest as well as in the best interest of others at any given time. And you
will be able to monitor those decisions to see how they impact you and your partner.

You would be surprised by how much turmoil a simple issue like different sleep patterns,
can cause between two people who love each other. Sometimes people immediately
compromise or give up behaviors or habits for the purpose of creating harmony, only to find
themselves uncomfortable, bitter, and resentful down the road.

Why? Sacrifice and compromise can cause discomfort that is hard to see coming. And the
bitterness and resentment can be exacerbated if we didn’t include our needs in the
compromise negotiation. Sometimes there are major adjustments that comes with
compromise, that directly affect our comfort zone, that must be considered in the initial

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