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discharge papers, so that her husband will not know that the baby has 3 My father-in-law also added that ultimately the secret will become
diabetes and infer from this that she is a diabetic as well. known and it is preferable that she reveal it rather than others telling
Must we tell the husband that the baby is sick, so that he will know her husband.
how to treat him when necessary? Perhaps just as the woman cares [There was a child sick with epilepsy, whose parents tried to hide
for herself while hiding from her husband that she has diabetes and the illness from his pre-school teacher. The child fainted in kindergar-
is treated with insulin, we can rely on her to care for the baby as well? ten and the teacher called an ambulance. As a result of the incident,
This being the case, perhaps there is no justification for upsetting their everyone found out about the child’s illness. Had only the teacher
shalom bayis and causing a divorce? Even if the husband is appeased, been told, the parents could have avoided knowledge about the illness
hard feelings will likely remain and cause disputes. spreading.]

1 AnsweR 1 SuMMaRy and Conclusions

I asked my father-in-law, Rav Y. S. Elyashiv zt”l, and he answered that The husband should be told about the diabetes. It is best if the wom-
one should inform the husband about the baby’s diabetes. There is no an herself reveals it, and then fully repents for her transgression.
reason to think about a possible separation or divorce that may result,
because anyway, their marriage is viewed as a mistaken transaction.
Had the husband known of the illness he would not have married
her, especially since she lied to him and misled him.
[See Tractate Baba Metzia (101b) which tells of a man who bought
a boat which was full of merchandise (barrels of wine), which he did
not have the room to store. A woman had a storage room where she
could accommodate the large barrels, but refused to rent him the
space. After some time, he convinced her to marry him and she agreed
and, and she stored the barrels in the storage room. The man then
went home and sent her a bill of divorce. She, in turn, hired workers
to move all his barrels outside and paid them from the barrels them-
selves. The case reached Rav Huna, son of Rav Yehoshua, who said:
As he did, so it should be done to him.]
One must also be concerned about the health of the child, and not
consider the anguish of the parents. For the sake of the baby’s health
and life it is better to tell the father, and not to rely solely on the
mother. Everything should be done to save his life. Despite the great
suffering that the parents’ separation is likely to cause the child, it is
more important to worry about his life than about peace and quiet in
the house.

66 1 Medical-HalacHic Responsa of Rav ZilbeRstein Hereditary Vision Defects 2 67