Page 106 - The Intentional Parent

annoying behavior. Meaning business means lowering your voice, looking your child right in the eye and saying, “I do not have the time or the patience for what you are doing right now, there will be consequences when we get home.” Notice I do not advice you to provide an “if you don’t behave” clause. The bad behavior has already happened. Do not reward a child for misbehaving then behaving.
The Intentions
I must have the patience to outlast obnoxious and irritating behavior.
If I give in to this behavior now, I know it is going to become worse in the future.
I do not want to teach my child to be the kind of person who intrudes on and takes advantage of others.
The best way I can love my child right now is to ignore the behavior he or she is showing.
By ignoring my child’s inappropriate behavior, I am modeling a behavior they might need in their future dealings with difficult people.
Turning Intention Into Action
Parents who I coach sometimes worry that ignoring a child’s behavior is “not enough.” What they are saying, in essence, is: “If I ignore my child’s difficult behavior I feel as though I am not taking enough ‘action.’ ” However, doing nothing is often doing something.
The Intentional Parent by Peter J. Favaro, Ph.D. 106