Page 181 - The Intentional Parent

original divorce. If this happens more than a few times, your children may begin to view relationships as heartbreaking and transitory. I believe that this is harmful to children; that's why I recommend that you keep your social life and your children as separate from one another as you can, until you are certain that the person is going to be around for a while. When you are certain, you can begin to encourage your children to adjust to the new person and the new situation.
WHEN PARENTS HAVE DIFFERENT DISCIPLINE STYLES
My wife and I have been divorced for six months. I have custody of our two children, who are aged eight and ten. My problem is that my wife and I have two completely different styles of disciplining our children. I am stricter and require the kids to do their homework right after school, because I know that after dinner they are tired and the quality of their work suffers if it's done then. They visit their mom on Wednesday nights for a sleepover. My son's teacher called to tell me he has failed two tests, both of which he took on Thursdays. I know he failed those tests because my wife did not help him prepare properly. What should I do?
Parents in your situation need to cooperate by giving and receiving feedback about matters that are important to the children. Consider calling your ex-wife and explaining in a neutral way that you are concerned about your son's failing test grades. If you think you will be met with resistance, make a copy of the tests and communicate in the form of a polite note. Suggest that you have had pretty good success helping your son study for tests by reviewing before dinner.
The Intentional Parent by Peter J. Favaro, Ph.D. 181