Page 194 - The Intentional Parent

afterward. My husband doesn't seem to think there's any harm in it, as long as we know where the kids are. What do you think?
I think the key is to understand what your son means by the word date. For many kids his age a date is when a group of boys and girls go out together and do something. Many fourth, fifth, and sixth graders have dates, as well as girlfriends or boyfriends that last a week or two. From what I can observe, being part of the dating scene is more of an issue of status than anything else. As kids enter the sixth and seventh grades, they become more interested in having a boyfriend or a girlfriend, and they begin to appreciate the companionship and intimacy of a close relationship. This is the age when parents feel that they need to supervise things a bit more carefully. It's also the time when many kids begin experimenting with sex by playing kissing games at parties and making out.
Although you would think that AIDS has probably made preteens and teens more aware of the dangers of experimenting with sex, it doesn't seem to have affected their curiosity. Some people have speculated that preteens and adolescents don't have a very good understanding of their own mortality and therefore deny that they could actually be killed by something like AIDS. This makes it all the more important for parents to keep the issue of AIDS at the top of kids' minds.
NUDITY AND YOUR CHILD
Is there anything wrong with a father taking a shower with his toddler-aged daughter? Our family is kind of uninhibited when it comes to walking around the house naked. We feel it's a natural thing and don't think twice about it. Some of our friends, however, think we're nuts and are messing up our kids.
The Intentional Parent by Peter J. Favaro, Ph.D. 194