Page 62 - You Only Live Once [BooksLD]
P. 62

Tara’s message had hit me right here, at this place. It felt like the world
                had collapsed around me. I couldn’t feel my feet.

                   The  more  I  got  to  know  her,  the  less  I  wanted  to  know.  I  had  known
                exactly what her desires were, who she had once wanted to become, and
                who she was trying to become now. Then, I heard from her that afternoon,
                not any other, that summer afternoon.

                   After  two  years  of  ordering  her  favorite  dish,  I  ordered  mine.  A  few
                minutes later, Ricky returned. This time, I couldn’t stop myself. I got up and
                hugged  him,  my  face  pressed  against  his  huge  athletic  body.  In  that
                moment,  the  fact  that  Tara  had  left  me  overpowered  my  fear  of  people
                seeing me cry. I clung to Ricky like yeast clings to bread, it did not feel

                unnatural.
                   I said, ‘I don’t desire anything now. I am a loser.’
                   Uncle Ricky told me, ‘I had always wanted to build a space that looks

                just like this, one that gives people the creative freedom to think, away from
                the madness of the new metropolitan areas, for people to be able to break
                free  from  their  constrained  lives  and  pursue  new  ideas,  ideas  that  could
                have an impact, ideas that could change the world.’

                   ‘I feel I have lost it all.’
                   ‘Everyone  you  feel  is  successful  now  made  a  start  someday.  That
                someday could be today for you. Whether you want to start a business, get
                an admission in your dream college, sing a song, or make a million dollars;

                you will have to start somewhere. Go for it! Now. That’s all,’ he reaffirmed.
                   When I didn’t stop sobbing, he interrupted, ‘Why are you hiding your
                face?’

                   ‘People are going to think that I have gone crazy.’
                   ‘When you laugh a lot, they call you crazy. When you cry a lot, they call

                you depressed. When you speak a lot, they say you should maybe speak
                less, and the list goes on and on. No matter what you do, they’ll put a label
                on you. But when you know who you are, it really doesn’t matter what label
                they put on you. I’m wild and crazy, yes! But I’m free. That’s how I love to
                label me!’ he giggled.

                   ‘You’re correct, stranger…uh oh, Ricky,’ I whispered under my breath.
                   ‘What are you passionate about? What gives you real contentment?’

                   ‘Making people laugh, cracking jokes.’
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