Page 43 - 100 Ways to Motivate Yourself

The rush we get after running through the waterfall of fear is the most

energizing feeling in the world. If you are ever in an undermotivated mood, find
something you fear and do it—and watch what happens.

27. Create the way you relate

We can’t create our truest selves without creating relationships in the
process. Relationships are everywhere. Relationships are everything.

“There is no end to relationship,” said the Indian spiritual leader
Krishnamurti. “There may be the end of a particular relationship, but
relationship can never end. To be is to be related.”

I have trained many corporations with a four-part seminar series. The first
three parts are on self-motivation, and the final part is on relationship-building.
Sometimes CEOs ask me up front, ahead of the training, if I don’t have that ratio
out of balance.

“Shouldn’t you have more of it be on relationship-building?” they ask.

“After all, team-building and customer relations are surely more important than
self-motivation.”

I stand by my ratio. We can’t relate to others if our relationship with
ourselves is poor. A commitment to personal motivation comes first. Because
who wants to have a relationship with someone who is not motivated in any
way? When we do get to the fourth part, relationship-building, the focus is on
creativity. Creativity is the most neglected and yet most useful aspect of
relationship building.

In relationships, most of us think with our emotions rather than our minds.
But to think with our feelings instead of our minds puts us in the unresourceful
state that Colin Wilson describes as being upside-down. When we view
relationships as opportunities for creativity, they always get better. When our
relationships get better, we are even more motivated.

My youngest daughter, Margie, was in fourth grade when a very shy girl in
her class accidentally put a large black mark on her own nose with an indelible
marker. Many of the kids in the class pointed at her and started to laugh. The
little girl was finally reduced to tears of embarrassment. At some point, Margie
walked over to the girl to give her some comfort. (Margie’s astonished teacher