Page 53 - moondani kyema
P. 53
ndani kyema, My Story - Ray Moore 53
When Alan came home soon after my peripatetic homecoming, it was the first time
that the six members of the family had ever been together. Frank was a baby when I
went to Chefoo, and Dorothy was born in 1942. Amy's cry of "I had two boys, one
whom I knew and understood, and one whom I hardly knew at all" was the warning
that this family was heading for a dysfunctional future.
My relationship with my parents was uneasy. Percy did not seem to know what to do
with this almost teenager. Mostly he did nothing and, although he was at home for a
good deal of the time, he made little or no eye contact with his eldest son, nor did he
make any effort to communicate with or understand me.
For example, I was very interested to watch Percy shaving in the morning. After all, I
had not seen anyone shave since I was six. As I tentatively approached him in the
bathroom, there was no greeting at all, and no indication whether I was welcome or
not. He continued shaving with no acknowledgement of this curious eleven year old.
Back in the bedroom, Amy was still in bed as Percy had risen much earlier and made
them both a cup of tea over a small pressure stove. They had then both spent an
hour or two separately studying their Bibles and praying. Percy took copious notes in
his fine, neat handwriting. I always admired this and his academic ability. He spoke
and wrote Chinese as well as any non-Chinese person.
Amy stayed in bed and, when we children
came in we were able to climb into bed with
her for a while. Frank would immediately
snuggle up beside her, but I sat on the bed,
unsure of whether I should show such
intimacy to this mother whom I hardly knew.
This same problem with intimacy and touch
appeared in church on Sundays also.
Percy would be preaching while we sat in
the pews with Amy and the rest of the
Chinese congregation. Frank always sat
beside Amy and she would stroke his arms
or draw pictures on his back. I longed for
this kind of attention, but I don't think Amy
knew how to relate to me at the age of
eleven - or any age.
Percy with millions of Sadly this applied even more so with Percy.
dollars for shopping money At one stage he saw it as his job to
enlighten me about the mysteries of sex. He
during the post-war took me to the unoccupied half of the
inflation mission home and proceeded to ‘educate’
me. Unfortunately his teaching was askew,
and, without going into details, the result
was that that inappropriate episode had a
long term effect on my life. I was 11 or 12
years old at the time.
When Alan came home soon after my peripatetic homecoming, it was the first time
that the six members of the family had ever been together. Frank was a baby when I
went to Chefoo, and Dorothy was born in 1942. Amy's cry of "I had two boys, one
whom I knew and understood, and one whom I hardly knew at all" was the warning
that this family was heading for a dysfunctional future.
My relationship with my parents was uneasy. Percy did not seem to know what to do
with this almost teenager. Mostly he did nothing and, although he was at home for a
good deal of the time, he made little or no eye contact with his eldest son, nor did he
make any effort to communicate with or understand me.
For example, I was very interested to watch Percy shaving in the morning. After all, I
had not seen anyone shave since I was six. As I tentatively approached him in the
bathroom, there was no greeting at all, and no indication whether I was welcome or
not. He continued shaving with no acknowledgement of this curious eleven year old.
Back in the bedroom, Amy was still in bed as Percy had risen much earlier and made
them both a cup of tea over a small pressure stove. They had then both spent an
hour or two separately studying their Bibles and praying. Percy took copious notes in
his fine, neat handwriting. I always admired this and his academic ability. He spoke
and wrote Chinese as well as any non-Chinese person.
Amy stayed in bed and, when we children
came in we were able to climb into bed with
her for a while. Frank would immediately
snuggle up beside her, but I sat on the bed,
unsure of whether I should show such
intimacy to this mother whom I hardly knew.
This same problem with intimacy and touch
appeared in church on Sundays also.
Percy would be preaching while we sat in
the pews with Amy and the rest of the
Chinese congregation. Frank always sat
beside Amy and she would stroke his arms
or draw pictures on his back. I longed for
this kind of attention, but I don't think Amy
knew how to relate to me at the age of
eleven - or any age.
Percy with millions of Sadly this applied even more so with Percy.
dollars for shopping money At one stage he saw it as his job to
enlighten me about the mysteries of sex. He
during the post-war took me to the unoccupied half of the
inflation mission home and proceeded to ‘educate’
me. Unfortunately his teaching was askew,
and, without going into details, the result
was that that inappropriate episode had a
long term effect on my life. I was 11 or 12
years old at the time.
