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When you're shouting “You don't appreciate a thing I do for you!” to your kids, what you mean is
“You aren't grateful for what I do for you. You don't value what I do for you. You don't see its
worth, how meaningful or important this thing I do for you is.”
Previously, we’ve all experienced feeling unappreciated by employers, girlfriends, boyfriends,
family members, spouses, friends, lovers, colleagues, in fact just about anybody you have ever
come into contact with. You feel that what you're offering isn't valued by the person you're
offering it to, and therefore they aren't grateful for it.

What happens when you do feel appreciated? Your spirits are lifted! You feel you are important
and worthy, competent and happy. You have the same effect on others when you show your
appreciation.

The previous sessions have covered self-awareness and acceptance. Bringing all we have
learned up to this point, the clear pathway to happiness through appreciation is simple, and
similar to an expression you will find in the relationships session later.

“Enter into the spirit of appreciation for what you can give, not to receive”
When we learn to accept that others may not have travelled so far along their path toward
happiness as we have, we can more readily accept that others may not be as equipped and
prepared to express appreciation as we are.

When you make the conscious decision to overturn all your childhood resistance to
appreciating, and start expressing is sincerely when it is due, you will experience a wealth of
increased happiness in your life.

When you do so, without the expectation of appreciation in return, when it does come, you will
appreciate appreciation so much more!

When you deliberately focus on appreciating someone or something, you nurture, express
support and love. As a result, they–and you–are transformed and the world between you is a
much happier place.
Appreciation on the surface appears to be a self-less act, when in fact it can be viewed as a
selfish act, benefiting the giver. Selfishness tends to get a “bad rap” but in reality it is
misunderstood. When you adopt an “attitude of gratitude”, the more you give, the better it feels
for you, the happier you will feel because you are recognised as an appreciative person. It feels
good folks! Everyone wins with appreciation, the giver and the receiver, it just doesn’t make
sense why anyone shouldn’t adopt it as a personality trait until it becomes a part of your
character.

Appreciation is a Powerful Transformative Energy

Appreciation has an extremely powerful transformative energy that changes lives from good to
great, from traumatic to joyous, from struggling to successful. Embracing the characteristic of
appreciation changes your very approach to life and living.

Learning how to use this energy can transform your life too. This energy comes not from your
usual guilt-bound appreciation, not from appreciative platitudes, or even from your heartfelt
appreciation but from a very different type of appreciation.