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must be honest with yourself before you can be honest
with others. It may feel selfish to talk about yourself ACTIVITY SUGGESTIONS:
and what you are going through, but it is necessary It’s important to have resources, information,
to ensure your mental health is intact. Find a friend, and examples to follow in order to get a good
group of friends, family, etc. you feel comfortable being start with communicating with loved ones
vulnerable with and disclose how you are feeling. You about mental health. Please view the following
never know what could happen and who else around and you are welcome to use these examples as
you could be experiencing the same or similar feelings.
conversation starters when you feel someone is
struggling with their mental wellness.
Social media can also be used to start the conversation “Are you okay?” or “How have you been feel-
on mental health. It allows for people to spread infor- ing lately?” - Ask this question but be aware of
mation about mental health in a mass form, so people their body language and response. Probe with
do not feel alone and know there are others out there additional questions with the body language and
dealing with the same situations. Social media makes response do not match.
mental health more digestible and realistic for its users
by creating memes, videos, and gifs about everyday “You haven’t seemed like yourself recently.”
situations that are also connected to mental health - This statement helps the person on the re-
and relatable. Social media also makes people more ceiving end know that someone has noticed a
comfortable discussing their issues because they are change in their behavior and can prompt further
behind a screen and able to type how they feel without conversation on what’s going on.
revealing the face behind the feeling. It allows them to
be vulnerable on their own terms and see the reactions “When you hear therapist or therapy/coun-
from friends and possibly strangers. Social media helps seling, what comes to your mind?” - A lot of
to make mental health more convenient as well be- people assume the worst when they hear the
cause it is always accessible. words therapy, counseling, or therapist. Help to
alleviate this stigma by providing information on
Everyone plays a part in starting the conversation what each word means and its purpose.
on mental health. It is not solely the responsibility of
therapists, primary care physicians, or other mental “How comfortable do you feel opening up to
health professionals to get the conversation started people when you’re in need?” or “Do you know
and get people informed. Let’s start asking friends and how to recognize when you need help” - This will
family how they’re feeling and probing for an honest create a conversation on insight for everyone in
response. Let’s start validating people’s feelings when the conversation.
they are honest and giving them a safe space. Listening
and being a genuine person is free!
Danielle Jones is a Georgia Licensed Professional Counselor with over
4 years of experience providing mental health services to people rang-
ing in ages from 4 years old to late adulthood. Danielle has therapeutic
experience within Juvenile Justice centers, psychiatric hospitals, and
school settings. Her passion lies with providing mental health services
to teens and young adults because she feels this population needs the
most assistance with making effective transitions and learning to man-
age their mental health during the transitions.
To Contact Danielle please reach her at the following platforms:
Email: findyourlovellc@gmail.com
Business Phone: 404.855.1041
IG: @teawithdanielle
16 | HELPFUL LIVING MAGAZINE
Parents
Raising
Children
with Mental
Illness
BY NAOMI BURKS
As a parent first and a mental health professional
second, my goals while working with teens and
their families are to open the lines of communica-
tion, promote understanding, and to plant HOPE
back in their lives. I’ve heard time and time again
from teens that “My parents just don’t understand
me, they don’t hear me, and they don’t love me.”
The mother in me knows this is not true and wants
to fix this feeling of rejection within the teen imme- Promoting understanding is the second key com-
diately, but this is not how therapy works.
This article is for parents that are raising children
who are experiencing mental health symptoms, as
in depressive symptoms, anxiety, bipolar disorder,
PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder), anger man-
agement issues, or drug misuse just to name a few.
The one piece of advice I would like for parents to
remember is to be “Gentle” with yourself as you
are raising your children. There is no such thing as
a perfect parent and while our children are expe-
riencing social, emotional stress in their lives at
school, sport clubs, at church, and in the communi-
ty parents are the ones that take the hits at home.
Opening the lines of communication is the first
key component to raising children that have men-
tal health symptoms. Children need to be heard
by their parents. Not talked to, not talked at, but
talked with. Communication is most effective when
both parties are heard with a listening ear, an open
heart, and looking at the situation from a different
perspective. An approach often used by therapists
is to view a situation or behavior differently from
what you have been doing, a technique known as
reframing. In this “shift” of perspective, insight into
what is triggering your child’s behavior often comes
into focus.
Sometimes, parents and their children can become
unstuck by looking at a situation with a new set of
eyes which is usually followed by acting or thinking
about things differently. And here’s the really good
news--when a parent responds in different ways
there is no choice for the child but to act differently
too.
ponent to raising children who are experiencing
mental health symptoms. It’s all too easy for par-
ents to only have tunnel vision when it comes to
their children. “What I say is law”, “You must do
what I say because I am the parent.” It’s easy to ap-
proach your children with tunnel vision. You know
what you want and that’s all you see. Unfortunate-
ly, tunnel vision will make you completely unaware
of the needs of your child.
Approaching the situation differently can be done
by being curious and gaining an understanding
from your child’s perspective. Their mental health
diagnosis might not resonate with you, simply
because you are not aware of their symptoms. Re-
searching the diagnosis and symptoms are a huge
help in understanding your child. Reassuring your
children that you see them and not their diagnosis.
Asking questions of your child’s therapist is “Okay”
and allowed to assist you in understanding how
to assist your child at home. Attending a parents’
support group and gaining a support system is
crucial to understanding that you are not in this
alone. Read books or articles about your child’s
current situation. Think back on your own child and
HELPFUL LIVING MAGAZINE | 17