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teaches us that had he indeed been truly ‘slaughtered,’ she would have
had the resources to bear it and her soul would not have left her, for
when Hakadosh baruch Hu sends an affliction he also bestows the
strength to bear it.”

In the end he himself went into his mother-in-law’s room, closing
the door behind him and the other members of the family stood
around, looking in through the windows… Rav Shlomo Zalman
began to calm her, explaining that since the Rebbetzin had suffered a
stroke, had she remained alive and been left completely paralyzed it
would have been a very difficult situation etc.

Then he told her the following: “You know that He – the Master
of the world – is completely good and that whatever He does is good;
sometimes we understand it and sometimes we don’t. You should
know that the Ribbono shel olam has taken your daughter to a world
that is completely good…” Then he said,“Now say along with me the
blessing,‘Blessed are You…the true Judge,’ word by word but without
crying.”

When the Shloshim [the thirtieth day after the loss] arrived, im-
mediately following the memorial service, he addressed her and said,
“Savta, there is a halachah in Shulchan Aruch (Yoreh De’ah 394:1)
which says that it is forbidden to be overly upset over a bereavement.
You must stop. You have grandchildren, great-grandchildren and
great-great-grandchildren. Do you want something to happen to
them?!” (See Mo’ed Katan 27b:“Whoever takes his loss overly harshly
will weep over a further death.”) She asked him, “What then shall I
do?” He answered,“Start singing a different tune! Sing,‘Ribbono shel
olam, watch over my grandchildren and great-grandchildren!’”

By the way, she was a very wise woman and she responded, “I’m
already too old to start singing new tunes, but if the Rav [i.e. her son-
in-law] says that is the halachah, then halachah is halachah!”

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