Page 259 - Bridget Jones's Diary - by Helen FIELDING

Bridget's for dinner, one gets Michelin star-style food in a bohemian setting.'

Mark Darcy will be v. impressed and will realize I am not common or
incompetent.

Sunday 5 November

9st (disaster), cigarettes 32, alcohol units 6 (shop has run out of Smoothies---
careless bastards), calories 2266, lottery tickets 4.

7 p.m. Humph. Bonfire night and not invited to any bonfires. Rockets going off

tauntingly left right and center. Going round to Tom's.

11 p.m. Bloody good evening at Tom's, who was trying to deal with the fact that
the Alternative Miss World title had gone to Joan of Bloody Arc.

'The thing that makes me really angry is that they say it isn't a beauty contest
but really it is. I mean, I'm sure if it wasn't for this nose . . . ' said Tom, staring at
himself furiously in the mirror.

'What?'

'My nose.'

'What's wrong with it?'