Page 36 - Student: dazed And Confused

Synopsis

This extract will, I hope, eventually extend itself into a novella or novel. As you can
see, it is told in two parts - then and now - though both are told by the same woman. This
extract is relatively short and the point of the whole piece is only touched upon here.
There are two stories here which both connect in quite an obvious way. Jess's
absentee father is suddenly back and her intense hostile feelings towards him unleashes a
power within her that leads us into older Jess' world. There is an underlying message to this

tale, which is to communicate your emotions, no matter how painful, but I believe every
piece of writing has a message if you look for it.
Young Jess is nine years old and lives in a world where everything she knows is
simple and carefree. But when her father returns to her life, things start getting
complicated. She feels as though she cannot talk openly about how she feels and bottles
her feelings up. As a child, she does not fully understand the importance of talking about
her thoughts and why she feels the way she does, and remains fairly quiet about the things
that really matter. Because she has kept everything inside, young Jess develop the ability to
cry tears that burn and to call fire from the skies in times of severe emotional need. She

doe
s not understand how destructive she is becoming, and cannot understand why tears are
not a sign of weakness.
I have not yet decided whether the child will decide for herself that she needs to get
helped or whether somebody will make the decision for her. Whichever way comes
naturally, Jess is next seen as an adult and in some kind of safe house. She is telling us how
the outside world is wrong and how they have not learned from her mistakes. Older Jess is
physically removed from reality, but she sees the problems with it being repeated over
again. We are also hearing her tell young Jess' story as she remembers it. Young Jess is
always referred to as a different person from older Jess, signalling that she believes they are

different people.
Young Jess made mistakes that older Jess thinks she has been rightfully paying for,
and having her act as the writer of this is her way of admitting to herself what she did and
why she did it. Although I have not yet made a firm decision on exactly what will happen in
the rest of this book, I have a rough idea of the plot and my characters, but I know that my
characters will develop themselves and they will dictate where the story goes from here.