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to be noted [because heaven will say: ‘Because this person is so True Distress
sure of his merits, let us examine him carefully’]. Rather, a person
should have a hopeful attitude that the Holy One, blessed be He, Therefore, Rabbi Natan is not sparing in the use of vivid imagery
will act out of His kindness. He should say to himself, ‘Who am I, a when he describes his adversity, his goal being to arouse his own
poor and contemptible person, who comes to ask something of the heart to be aware of his danger and to teach us how we too must
King, King of kings, the Holy One, blessed be He? I can only appeal arouse our hearts whenever we pray regarding spiritual matters. For
to His vast kindness with which He treats His creatures’” (Shulchan example (Prayer 31):
Aruch: Orach Chaim 98).
Master of the world, You know of my embittered,
However, the implication of everything that I have discussed pounding heart. You know the copious amount
above is that the concern about “contemplating one’s prayer” is of troubles in my soul, which I cannot bear. You
relevant only regarding a person’s prayers for physical matters. In
the physical realm, heaven is not obligated to fulfill his requests, know the bitterness of my sighs, my numerous
and heaven has its own reckonings. However, in spiritual matters, troubles, my distress, my poverty, my labors and
there is no such concern. Hashem wants a person to be spiritually my misery. Hashem, woe to my nefesh, my ruach
effective and successful. The more insistent he is, the more heaven and my neshamah. Woe, how deeply my body is
wants to give him what he wants. Therefore, it is no problem for a afflicted.
person to stand and request spiritual attainments with all his might,
because he is asking to attain the fear of heaven, he is asking to be I cry out to You and sigh from the depths of my
in accord with Hashem’s will, and he is seeking Hashem Himself, exile, from the very lowest depths, like a person
as it were. who has been the target of every kind of arrow,
spear and sword, all of which are still piercing his
Positive or Negative body. His every limb is pierced by thousands—
by tens of thousands—of arrows, spears and bows
Therefore, the Gemara sometimes regards the concept of smeared with every sort of bitter and noxious
“contemplating one’s prayer” positively and at other times poison. Multitudes of wild beasts, snakes and
negatively (as the commentaries explain). On the one hand, the scorpions surround him on every side. And he
sages state that contemplating one’s prayer is among a set of is encompassed in enclosure within enclosure, as
positive actions the fruit of which a person eats in this world and thousands upon thousands and tens of thousands of
whose principal he receives in the world-to-come. On the other
hand, the Gemara says that contemplating one’s prayer recalls a guards and criminals stand around him, constrain
person’s sins. him and do not even allow him to lift his head a
hairsbreadth, even for a brief moment. They shut
We must be aware that the contemplation of prayer in a negative his mouth, confuse his mind, and twist his heart at
sense refers to prayer for physical matters. The Holy One, blessed be every minute and every moment to keep him from
He, determines the exact conditions under which every individual is crying out to You, from seeking Your compassion
to serve Him. A person who whines and complains and, moreover, and from hoping in Your salvation.
who thinks that Hashem must fulfill his requests, is very foolish
and lacks the initial level of faith (as I have discussed at length I am poor and in pain—much, much worse off