Page 50 - 20780
P. 50

Chapter Two:   | 55    50 | A New Light                                                                                             Chapter Two:   | 47

 will—and a person’s will is always in his hands. “So why didn’t you   and you would have attained goals that you could not otherwise   great things with just a small amount of will power. This means that
 want?”   have  dreamed  of  attaining, because heaven  possesses all of  the           in many instances if a person says that he cannot do something
          resources that can help you attain everything you want. But even if           the  truth is that  he  does  not  want to  do  it.  As they  say in the
 When Rabbi Natan was later asked if he had really said this, he   you didn’t actually achieve your goals, if you were strong in your   army, “‘I can’t’ is first cousin to ‘I don’t want to.’” That means
 replied, “I said it, and I didn’t say it.” He meant that everyone will   will, it would be written down in heaven that you succeeded, and   that this person is deceiving himself, because when he wants to do
 have to give a reckoning of his life. But then he will see that had   no complaints would remain against you—because your will is the   something, he does it.
 he recited these prayers, his reckoning would be less. Why would   essence of what is wanted of you.”
 it be less? That is because a person is judged in accordance with his                    This is an important principle about intent, which doesn’t require
 will. If he had prayed and expressed his will to attain holy matters,   Why Didn’t You Want?  lengthy  exposition.  A  wonderful  story in  Tana Devei  Eliyahu
 he would have succeeded in attaining some of them through the                          illustrates this point.
 power of his prayer, because “in the way that a person wishes to
           With Hashem’s help, I found another proof for this concept in
 go, he is led.” And even regarding those matters that he would not   an important halachic work,  Hilchot  Talmud  Torah,  by Rabbi   Once, as I was traveling, [tells Elijah the prophet,] I
 attain, if he had wanted and prayed for them, he will be judged   Shneur Zalman of Liadi, author of the Tanya, which in discussing   met a man who did not know Chumash or Mishnah, and
 in accordance with what he wanted, and he will receive reward as   this matter makes an incisive and striking statement that we could   who spoke [of Torah learning] scornfully and mockingly.
 though he did attain them.
          never have said on our own. I will quote the passage and then put
          the material in the context of our generation. Rabbi Shneur Zalman                   When he turned to me,  I  told him: “My son, how
 “You Test Him at Every Moment”  of Liadi writes (Shulchan Aruch Harav: Yoreh Deah: Hilchot Talmud Torah   will  you  answer your Father in heaven  on the  day  of
          3):                                                                                judgment?”
 Essentially, we  must  know  that the  statement that heaven’s
 judgment concerns a person’s will is not only speaking about what   The sages said (Yoma 35b): Hillel obligates the poor to   He said to me: “Rabbi, I will have an answer for my
 will happen to him after he passes away, because heaven judges a   be judged by heaven, because [he mastered the Torah   Father in heaven on the day of judgment. I will tell Him
 person in this world every year on Rosh Hashanah. In addition, as   despite  his poverty,  and  so  other  poor  people  are   that heaven  did  not give  me  the  understanding and
 the mishnah states (Rosh Hashanah 16a), the entire world is judged a   compared to him]. They do not fulfill the mitzvah of   knowledge to learn Chumash and Mishnah.”
 few other times of the year as well. Furthermore, a baraita teaches   learning Torah since they must work to earn a living the
 (ibid.): “Rabbi Yossi says that a person is judged every day. As the                          I told him: “My son, what is your profession?”
 verse states, ‘You visit him every morning’ (Job 7:18). Rabbi Natan   entire day or most of the day. But they are not acting
 says that a person is judged every moment. As the [same] verse   as Hillel did. He would cut wood every day to earn half   He told me: “I catch fish in nets.”
 states, ‘You test him at every moment.’”  a dinar. He would give half of this to the guardian of
              the study hall, which in those days was located in the                           I told him, “My son, who told you how to take linen
 The holy books teach there are 24 heavenly courts, and at every   field, [to gain admittance]. From the other half [of his   and weave it into nets and cast them into the sea, and
 hour of the day and night one of these courts judges a person for   salary], he would support himself and his family—i.e.,   raise fish out of the sea?”
 his deeds. If he is judged favorably, he experiences joy, blessing   the amount of three pundayonot (an ancient currency).
 and well-being. But if he is judged negatively, he feels depressed   In those days, for a pundyon, one could buy a loaf of
 and heavy, experiences suffering, and faces obstacles. Although a   bread that had the volume of six eggs (a little more than   He said to me, “Rabbi, understanding and knowledge
 person’s principal judgment occurs on Rosh Hashanah, that is only                           were given to me for this from heaven.”
 in regard to the core of the judgment: whether he will live or die,   300 grams). And he would also use that [money] for
 how he will earn a living, how much he will earn, and other such   other household expenses, as well as for Sabbaths and   I  said to him:  “My son, just  as understanding  and
 general matters. But regarding how each day and hour will pass,   holidays. And although not every person can do this   knowledge were given to you on how to cast nets and
 whether for  the  good  or not,  depends  upon heavenly  judgment   literally as did Hillel, nevertheless [heaven] judges   raise fish out of  the  sea,  when it comes to  words of
   45   46   47   48   49   50   51   52   53   54   55