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BECOMING ONE

an even greater

What is sacrificial love? What does that even mean?? I had no idea. Little did I know that

God would give me a real-life, real-time lesson on this very topic as we were planning this
summer edition of Grace the Magazine.

As I mention in my bio, I am a newlywed. working on the inside, teaching us about definitely headed in the right direction! sweet, soft-spoken husband were worse

(You may be giggling about newlyweds sacrificial love. than any rejection on a house. He
learning about sacrificial love.) We got In January of this year, my husband was proceeded to tell me that we had some
married last April and had a “COVID So, what happens when two 40-something sharing his dream of becoming a cracks in our (marital) foundation that
wedding” at the church, just us, the pastor, year-olds get married? Well, let me tell you homeowner. Our lease was ending and we needed to be addressed and he felt this
photographer, and a few well-wishers a bit of our story. We learned we did not were ready for the next step, or so we was partly why we had not been successful

gathered outside. Being newlyweds, we know how to communicate very well, even thought. He had not been through the in finding a house. I was terrified but I knew
faced the “normal” challenges most after premarital counseling. We were two homebuying process and I had, so I he was right. Over the following days and
couples experience after becoming one. selfish people, even stubborn at times, not immediately jumped to action. Did I weeks, we revisited our goals as individuals,

You know, things like: he is a morning to mention both being pretty independent, mention I am a doer?? Notice I did not say for our marriage, and for our finances. We
person and I am a night owl, which family perhaps as a result of our many years of that I stopped and prayed or asked God if talked about what we wanted our future to
are we spending the holidays with, setting singleness. There were also some past now was the right time, which was a lesson look like. Our marriage verse (Eccl 4:12, “A
a budget, different sexual views and relationship wounds that were not healed. in and of itself. The homebuying process is person standing alone can be attacked and
desires, who’s church are we attending, and The process of becoming one flesh (Gen stressful under normal circumstances, defeated, but two can stand back-to-back

the list goes on and on. Not only were we 2:24 NIV) isn’t always pretty. However, we much less in an extremely competitive and conquer. Three are even better, for a
dealing with these common issues, but we learned some awesome things too--we market. We submitted so many offers that triple-braided cord is not easily broken”)
were also in the midst of a global both love the Lord more than we love each were rejected and I started to become keeps us focused on what is most

pandemic. Racial tensions were at an all- other, and we are committed to the success numb to the process. The sixth rejection important to us: keeping God in the middle.
time high in the US and seeping into our of our marriage. Days of silence stemming really took the wind out of my sails, like
home. And I had just left my career of 20+ from not knowing how to talk about our someone punched me in the gut. Shortly after having “the talk”, we were
years in the corporate world to be a stay- feelings taught us that when one hurts, we rejected once again. With tears streaming
at-home wife. Needless to say, we were a both hurt. Sobs in the shower and in each Then I heard the words that no spouse down my face and feeling very

petri dish for conflict and division. But another’s arms taught us that our marriage wants to hear, “we need to talk”, followed discouraged, I began asking God why this
God!!! While we were trying to manage is a safe place. We have not mastered the by “we have some issues we need to work has been such a struggle. It was one of
the pressures from the outside, He was art of communication yet, but we are on”. Those words, firmly articulated by my those soul-bearing, “God, help, I don’t know

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