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are loved. ƚŽ DŽŵŵLJ ĂŶĚ ƚŚĞŶ LJŽƵ Śŝƚ DŽŵŵLJ͘
ͻ Discuss. Later that evening or at zŽƵ ŚĂǀĞ ƚŽ ŚĂǀĞ ƟŵĞ ŽƵƚ ǁŚĞŶ LJŽƵ ĚŽ
Ă ĐĂůŵ ƟŵĞ ďĞĨŽƌĞ ďĞĚƟŵĞ͕ ƉĂƌĞŶƚƐ ĐĂŶ ƚŚŝŶŐƐ ůŝŬĞ ƚŚĂƚ͘͟
discuss with the child the events that led tŚĞŶ Ă ĐŚŝůĚ ŝƐ ŝŶ ƚŚĞ ŵŝĚƐƚ ŽĨ Ă Įƚ͕ ŚĞ
ƵƉ ƚŽ ƚŚĞ ƟŵĞ ŽƵƚ͘ dŚŝƐ ǁŝůů ĂůůŽǁ ĞǀĞƌLJ- ǁŝůů ŶŽƚ ďĞ ĂďůĞ ƚŽ ĂƩĞŶĚ ƚŽ ƚŚĂƚ ŬŝŶĚ ŽĨ
ďŽĚLJ ƚŽ ƌĂƟŽŶĂůůLJ ĂŶĚ ĐĂůŵůLJ ĞǀĂůƵĂƚĞ speech, plus that defeats the purpose of
ŚŽǁ ƚŽ ďĞƩĞƌ ƉƌŽĐĞĞĚ ŝŶ ƚŚĞ ĨƵƚƵƌĞ͘ Ă ͞ƟŵĞ ŽƵƚ͟ ĨƌŽŵ ĂƩĞŶƟŽŶ͘ dŚĞƌĞĨŽƌĞ͕
ƐƟĐŬ ƚŽ ĂƐ ĨĞǁ ǁŽƌĚƐ ĂƐ ƉŽƐƐŝďůĞ͘
Errors While Enforcing Time Out Eo real Ɵme out. When children act out
ǁŚŝůĞ ƉůĂĐĞĚ ŝŶ ƟŵĞ ŽƵƚ͕ ƉĂƌĞŶƚƐ ŽŌĞŶ
>iƩle Ɵme in͘ /Ŷ ŽƌĚĞƌ ĨŽƌ ƟŵĞ ŽƵƚ ƚŽ respond to them. If they are yelling, they
ǁŽƌŬ͕ ƚŚĞƌĞ ŚĂƐ ƚŽ ďĞ Ă ůŽƚ ŽĨ ͞ƟŵĞ ŝŶ͟ tell them to be quiet and if they are laugh-
in the family. In other words, you need ing they tell them to be quiet. Instead,
ƚŽ ĐƌĞĂƚĞ Ă ƉŽƐŝƟǀĞ ĂŶĚ ƌŝĐŚ ĞŶǀŝƌŽŶŵĞŶƚ simply ignore their responses as long as
ĨŽƌ ĐŚŝůĚƌĞŶ ŝŶ LJŽƵƌ ŚŽŵĞ ƐŽ ƚŚĂƚ ƚŚĞ ƟŵĞ ƚŚĞLJ ĂƌĞ ŝŶ ƟŵĞ ŽƵƚ͘ dŝŵĞ ŽƵƚ ƐŚŽƵůĚ
ŽƵƚ ŝƐ ƐŝŵƉůLJ Ă ͞ƟŵĞ ŽƵƚ͟ ĨƌŽŵ Ăůů ƚŚĞ ƐŝŵƉůLJ ďĞ Ă ƟŵĞ ŽƵƚ ĨƌŽŵ Ăůů ƌĞƐƉŽŶƐĞƐ͘
ĞdžĐŝƟŶŐ ƚŚŝŶŐƐ ƚŚĂƚ ĂƌĞ ŐŽŝŶŐ ŽŶ ĂƌŽƵŶĚ
them. Otherwise, children will choose to
ŵŝƐďĞŚĂǀĞ ŝŶ ŽƌĚĞƌ ƚŽ ŐĞƚ ƚŚĞ ĂƩĞŶƟŽŶ The Case Against Time Out
;ĞǀĞŶ ŝĨ ŝƚ ŝƐ ŶĞŐĂƟǀĞͿ ƚŽ ĞůŝĐŝƚ Ă ƌĞƐƉŽŶƐĞ
Bulletin
from their parents. Dr. Dan Siegel, in his book No Drama Dis-
Lots of threats. DĂŶLJ ƉĂƌĞŶƚƐ / ǁŽƌŬ ǁŝƚŚ cipline, writes:
ŽŌĞŶ ƚŚƌĞĂƚĞŶ ƚŚĞŝƌ ĐŚŝůĚƌĞŶ ǁŝƚŚ ƟŵĞ
out, but do not enforce it. This will under- You really can discipline in a way that’s
ŵŝŶĞ ƚŚĞ ǁŚŽůĞ ŝĚĞĂ ŽĨ ƟŵĞ ŽƵƚ͘ ŵƉƚLJ full of respect and nurturing, but that also
ƚŚƌĞĂƚƐ ĚŽ ŶŽƚ ďƌĞĞĚ ƉŽƐŝƟǀĞ ďĞŚĂǀŝŽƌ͘ maintains clear and consistent bounda-
Too much talk. tŚĞŶ ƉƵƫŶŐ ĐŚŝůĚƌĞŶ ŝŶ ries͘ /n other words, you can do beƩer͘
ƟŵĞ ŽƵƚ͕ ƉĂƌĞŶƚƐ ŽŌĞŶ ;ďĞĐĂƵƐĞ ƚŚĞLJ ĂƌĞ You can discipline in a way that’s high on
ƐŽ ĂŐŝƚĂƚĞĚͿ ǁŝůů ůĞŶŐƚŚŝůLJ ĞdžƉůĂŝŶ ƚŽ ƚŚĞŝƌ relaƟonship, high on respect, and low on
ĐŚŝůĚƌĞŶ ǁŚLJ ƚŚĞLJ ĂƌĞ ŐŽŝŶŐ ƚŽ ƟŵĞ ŽƵƚ͘ drama and conŇict ʹ and in the process,
&Žƌ ŝŶƐƚĂŶĐĞ͕ Ă ƉĂƌĞŶƚ ŵŝŐŚƚ ƐĂLJ͕ ͞DŽƐŚĞ͕ you can foster development that builds
LJŽƵ ĂƌĞ ŐŽŝŶŐ ƚŽ ƟŵĞ ŽƵƚ ďĞĐĂƵƐĞ LJŽƵ good relaƟonship sŬills and improves
ŐƌĂďďĞĚ ƚŚĞ ďĂůů ĂŶĚ LJŽƵ ǁŽƵůĚŶ͛ƚ ůŝƐƚĞŶ
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