Page 96 - EAP Manual

Interpersonal Effectiveness Balance Priorities & Demands
Relationships can be challenging for many different reasons. DBT describes that unbalanced priorities and demands can strain relationships. Finding a balance between priorities and demands is really important so I as well as others can get what we need in the relationship.
What are Priorities? Priorities are things that are important to me. List the things I want to spend time on:
  
What might happen if all my time is spent on priorities?  Others may feel angry, neglected or unimportant 

Example: If Jake ignores his mom’s requests for him to do his chores, and instead spends all his time playing video games, his mom will probably get angry and this could lead to fights.
What are Demands? Demands are things that are important to other people. List the things that others want me to spend time on:
 
What can happen if all my time is spent on demands?
 You may feel overwhelmed and stressed
 I might feel resentful toward others 
Example: If Jake spends all his time on chores, and does not take a break to play video games to unwind, Jake will probably feel burned out, overwhelmed, and this could also lead to fights with his mom.
What does balance look like?
Example: If Jake spends some of his time on video games and some of his time on chores, both him and his mom will get what they need and they will be less likely to get into fights.
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