Page 218 - A Woman Is No Man

The one thing she had done right was to manage to keep it from the
girls. She couldn’t tell them the truth—why, of course she couldn’t! How
could she explain what had happened—that their father had killed their

mother, that their father had killed himself—without ruining them, too?
Sometimes it was best to keep quiet. Sometimes the truth hurt the most. She
couldn’t have them walking around like they were damaged goods.
Sheltering them was the only way they had a chance at normal lives. She
had hoped people would forget in time, wouldn’t ostracize them, would
even ask for their hands in marriage one day. She had wanted to save their
reputations, save them the shame.

“Not this again,” Fareeda said, keeping her face steady. “Is that why you
woke me up? To talk about this?”
“I know my father killed my mother! I know he killed himself, too!”
Fareeda swallowed hard. She felt as though a rock was stuck in her
throat. Where was all this coming from? Had she heard something at
school? It was possible, though unlikely. For years Fareeda had asked her

friends never to mention the subject in front of her granddaughters, asking
them to tell their children to do the same. And in a community as tightly
knit as theirs, it had worked. Over a decade, and not one slipup. Sometimes
she wondered if the girls at her granddaughters’ school even knew what had
happened. Perhaps their parents hadn’t told them, afraid it would give them
the wrong idea about marriage. Sometimes Fareeda wondered the same
thing herself. She knew she shouldn’t have told Sarah what had happened to

Hannah. Perhaps that’s why she’d run away, Fareeda often told herself. But
she brushed these thoughts aside. She couldn’t be sure what Deya knew, so
she decided to feign ignorance. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.
Your parents died in a car accident.”
“Did you hear me? I know what he did!”
Fareeda remained silent. What would she look like, admitting the truth

after all these years? A complete fool. She couldn’t do it. Why dwell on the
past? People should always move on, no matter what. They should never
look back.
“Fine.” Deya reached into her pocket and pulled out a crumpled
newspaper clipping. She held it up so Fareeda could see it. “It doesn’t
matter if you say nothing. Sarah already told me everything.”
Fareeda began to shiver as though all the heating units in the house had

let out at once. She pulled her nightgown over her knees, tugging on the