Page 222 - A Woman Is No Man

the word manly, he had said, almost spitting as he did. Well, that’s because
he wasn’t a man, Fareeda told herself now, adding two spoonfuls of sugar to
her tea. Neither was Ali, who had taken off to live in the city with some

girl, leaving her to raise her granddaughters on her own. Leaving her to
clean up the family mess once again.
“You know,” Fareeda said after a moment, “Arabs use the term majnoon
to mean madness, but if you break the word apart, what do you see?” Deya
only looked at her. “The word jinn,” Fareeda said, settling back in her seat.
“Madness is derived from the jinn, an evil spirit inside you. Therapy and
medicine can’t fix that.”

“Are you serious? That’s your explanation for everything? You think
you can just blame this on the jinn? That’s not good enough. This isn’t
some story, where you can tie up everything as you please at the end. This
isn’t make-believe.”
“If only it were make-believe,” Fareeda said.
“That still doesn’t explain why you tried to cover for him,” Deya said.

“How could you? You won’t even forgive your own daughter when all she
ever did was run away! You’re such a hypocrite!”
Fareeda tightened her grip around the teacup. Outside, the sky was dark,
only the glow of a few lampposts visible through the window. She stared
absently at the darkness as she considered Deya’s words. Why had she
never really blamed Adam—had forgiven him, even? Sarah hadn’t killed
anyone, hadn’t left her with four girls to look after. And yet it was true, she

had never been able to forgive her. She and Khaled had erased Sarah from
their lives completely, as if they had never had a daughter, as if she had
committed the grossest of crimes. She was so afraid of the shame the family
would face that she had never even questioned it. Deya was right: she was a
hypocrite. An ocean of sadness rushed through her, and she began to weep.
For a long time Fareeda wept. Though she had buried her face in her

hands, she could feel Deya’s eyes on her, waiting for an explanation, an
answer. If only life were so simple.