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Introduce a telephone service for busy, forgetful or self-
obsessed individuals to maintain the illusion that they
are concerned about their friends. Once a month, the
user would record a generic voice message along the
lines of ‘Hi! Just wondering how you are?’ They would
then enter the phone numbers of friends and

291acquaintances. The service would dial the numbers
until an answer machine was reached and would then

leave the message. Should a friend actually answer the

phone, the system would play back one of a large

selection of recordings of vaguely foreign people
explaining that they have the wrong number.
Editor’s note:
Sam Torme A similar result can be
16 September 2001 created simply by
flipping through
Launch a new cable or digital television channel calledchannels with no
‘The Random Channel’. The channel would broadcast regard to television
much the same fare as its competitors but would never listings. Allegedly, this
publish schedules or listings. The channel could run an
is how the male half
292ad campaign with the strap line: ‘You don’t know whatof the population
you’re missing’.

David Owen prefers to watch
17 September 2001 television anyway.