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Choice 3
Invite the CEO to explain her reservations, but make it clear that the deci-
sion stands unless she indicates something that your people cannot have
known that effects the decision. You make it abundantly clear that you
have absolute faith in the capability and motives of your team and that you
only pass down decisions to those best qualified to make them.

Commentary
If both provisos, that it is your decision and that you have absolute faith in
your people are met then fine, but make sure that you can really listen to
the counter arguments with an open mind. In our psychology of customer
behaviour training we have to teach salespeople to listen with the appro-
priate mindset. The salesperson is motivated by a desire to win and far too
often sees the customer as an antagonist who must be beaten. If we are not
careful the salesperson mentally prepares his or her own “devastating”
counter arguments as they “listen” and misses what the customer is trying
to communicate. A little discipline helps. We insist that they:

n Listen actively to put himself or herself genuinely in the place of
the customer and really understand what the customer is thinking
and feeling even when the customer must subsequently be shown
that they are wrong to think and feel as they do – though they, as
fallible human beings, have every right to be wrong.

n Prove that they understand by reflecting back to the customer, in
different words, either the content or the feelings behind the
content. (“Let me be sure that I have understood you, you feel that
. . . or . . . you are saying that . . .”)

n Show empathy so that the customer that is wrong never feels
deprived of the right to make a mistake. (“I’m not surprised at how
you feel, a lot of people feel as you do at first.”)

n Take responsibility for any misunderstanding. (“It’s my fault, I
should have explained that . . .”)

n Deal with the specific concern that has been raised and never try to
guess what may lie behind what is being said.

n Let the customer raise further concerns and listen just as carefully
and courteously before dealing with them in turn to the
satisfaction of the customer.

A similar approach works when overcoming opposition to ideas or con-
cepts. You may wish to try it without allowing it to decline in to a parrot-
like formula. Choose your words with care. In spite of the nonsense
spouted by some of us psychologists about non-verbal communication
words can make a world of difference. Try saying “good morning ladies” or
“good morning girls” in a Midwestern office instead of simply “good morn-
ing” and you will soon be told what difference a word makes. (Both
“ladies” and “girls” are interpreted as attempts to be patronizing that
show a high degree of inappropriate sexual prejudice.)

“Leadership is what leaders DO!” 101