Page 58 - Taming Your Gremlin A Surprisingly Simple Method for Getting Out of Your Own Way (Rick Carson)_Neat

Look over your responses to the statements above. They offer clues to
your habits regarding anger. There is no need for you to be cautious about
acknowledging your beliefs and/or habits. Doing so does not imply that you

need to change anything. Of course, your gremlin will have you judge your
responses. Instead, simply notice and relax. However you responded to
these items is fine, and remember: even if you spot a pattern for handling
your anger that you aren’t proud of, you don’t have to change it. If you
want to play with an option, that’s fine. We’ll talk in depth about playing
with options later, but for now, let go of any judgment and simply notice.

If you become aware of beliefs or habits relevant to your reaction to
anger, you may wish to jot them down. Think through the validity of these

beliefs or habits for you at this stage of your life, remembering that a habit
that made sense when it was formed may have little value in your life here
and now. You might want to make a different choice. Or not.

Now, what about sadness, sexual feeling, fear, and joy? Yes, joy.

Joy

I meet people frequently who suppress joy. I love the late Charles
Schulz’s pictures of Snoopy doing his suppertime dance. Such open joy is a
beautiful thing. But some folks confuse explosive joy with irresponsibility,
immaturity, and being out of control (sometimes as a result of the “children

should be seen and not heard” belief). Such notions are the tools of your
gremlin.

A full expression of delight is not only good for the health and
disposition of the bearer, it powerfully affects even those around you.

I remember a day in 1983 when I took my son, Jonah, to Stubbs
Barbecue in Lubbock, Texas, for lunch. Jonah was 6 at the time. While he
gnawed on the ribs of some blessed bovine, I nibbled carrot sticks and

jalapeños and chowed down on a baked potato the size of a cantaloupe. I’d
been a strict vegetarian for five years. I ate no meat, red or otherwise, no
eggs or animal products, and no fish. After picking the last rib clean, Jonah
leaned back in his chair and took a drink of Coke. Then he licked his lips