Page 85 - REACHING ALWAYS FOR MY SECOND ELEMENT

I always thought of myself as a quick learner, but now I know I let that ugly thing called pride get in the way. So much
of my life missed, so many of the love lessons not realized until the absents of that love had gone. Thirty plus years to

get it right. I went through the motions but failed to know or interpret my heart. Lost the greatest gift ever in this life,
my Joyselyn, she was never mine; heaven-sent and only on loan.

I need so much to recall all Joyselyn’s life lessons she prayerfully put into place for me. I was so much Loved! I had the
most beautiful life of Love anyone could dream or imagine. A helpmate, best friend, healer, a Lover of this sorry soul of

a man.

How do I go on? How do I honor this lovely woman? --- God, help me see her again! I cannot say where she is because I
have never had a vision of Heaven nor the imagination or a right to offer up any interpretation, But I do know who she
is with. I know she is in no more pain; I know she is happy without me. That is okay by me. Hurts sometimes, but

that's ugly sinful, delusional behavior, pride once more trying to creep in.

June 12, 2020

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