Page 50 - Meeting with Children Manual

Section 4 P a ge | 48

Now, we are going to make a legend (draw a box). Can you choose 4 colors
(offering markers/crayons). Now choose which color goes with a straight
line and we will call that a close or good relationship where people get
along. Next choose another color that goes with a not good relationship or
a relationship where people fight and we can make up/down lines. Next

choose a color that goes with a so/so relationship (sometimes ok and
sometimes not) and we can make a dotted line for that one. Next you can
decide what other kind of relationship you can think of. Is there another
line you want to add? Ok, now let’s put lines between people on the
picture. Who has a good relationship with someone?

Begin in the positive. You may have to prompt along the way such as,

What about you and mum/mom? You and dad?

Then if child is old enough (8 and up) you could do a relationship legend and then be
asked to draw lines between family members (conflict, close, so/so etc). The language
for the legend is done with the child. As is the case in the picture below, the child
chose: “don’t get along, gets along and so-so” as possible relationship lines between
people. The child can then choose types of lines to draw between figures. If the child
cannot do this due to age or stage of development you could do an enquiry and ask if
the dinosaur gets along with the lizard – or if this one gets along with that one etc. You
may ask many other things such as “If there was one character the fox would like to
do more with who would that be?” Always stay in the metaphor to provide distance
(See Inquiry Skills).

For the second part of the meeting the child/youth may have enough time to choose
and activity of their choice such as a drawing, clay, play a game or talking. You can also
provide art materials for self-expression.

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