Page 64 - the-idiot

and where to wound him and how, and therefore, as the
marriage was still only in embryo, Totski decided to con-
ciliate her by giving it up. His decision was strengthened by
the fact that Nastasia Philipovna had curiously altered of
late. It would be difficult to conceive how different she was
physically, at the present time, to the girl of a few years ago.
She was pretty then … but now! … Totski laughed angrily
when he thought how short-sighted he had been. In days
gone by he remembered how he had looked at her beautiful
eyes, how even then he had marvelled at their dark myste-
rious depths, and at their wondering gaze which seemed to
seek an answer to some unknown riddle. Her complexion
also had altered. She was now exceedingly pale, but, curi-
ously, this change only made her more beautiful. Like most
men of the world, Totski had rather despised such a cheaply-
bought conquest, but of late years he had begun to think
differently about it. It had struck him as long ago as last
spring that he ought to be finding a good match for Nas-
tasia; for instance, some respectable and reasonable young
fellow serving in a government office in another part of the
country. How maliciously Nastasia laughed at the idea of
such a thing, now!
However, it appeared to Totski that he might make use of
her in another way; and he determined to establish her in St.
Petersburg, surrounding her with all the comforts and lux-
uries that his wealth could command. In this way he might
gain glory in certain circles.
Five years of this Petersburg life went by, and, of course,
during that time a great deal happened. Totski’s position