Page 16 - Mega Bridal Issue

GREEK MARRIAGE marry. I’m not a city person at all so that visit was hell for me. He took me
all over the place and it became apparent that he was more of a city man
than the islander that I’d thought he was and I was still wearing blinders, be-
ing bowled over by the whole foreign and Greek mystique: Ya, 37 years old
and still naive. I asked to see his suit for the wedding, but all I got were a
OR Tragedy? bunch of reasons for it not being possible and I believed him and continued
to hand over more money. I did put my foot down on the subject of living in
Athens after we got married. He fought me on it but eventually agreed that
Story & Photo By Persephone Roland-Holst our home base would be the island of Ios. So far so good..... Kind of.
Back I went to California. I planned extensively but the biggest challenge
was getting my parents, sisters and six or so relatives over to Ios in April
Of course we’ve all read about or watched movies on the woman traveling and ensuring their accommodations at a time of year when most hotels
to Greece in order to find herself, take her strength back. Yup, these fun were still closed for winter. Getting to the island of Ios is no small adventure
stories all end up the same: Lot’s of life changing romance and adventure. either. First the long flight to Athens followed by a taxi from the airport to
The Greek men are notorious romantics and always say the right thing, port where one boards a huge multi-storied ship that, at that time, took 8-9
so unlike the majority of American men. Not to mention the whole foreign hours with many stops before finally reaching the island. My parents and
exotic aspect. Oh and don’t forget the wonderful accents and language relatives were all older and, being from well off families, expected a certain
barriers which allow for our own feminine color and wishful creativity to fill in level of comfort of which Ios didn’t have. The other hitch was the fact that in
the blanks. Being bombarded with all the above is an inevitable recipe for order to be married in a Greek church one has to have been baptized Greek
romantic idiocy. orthodox, which of course I was not.
I returned to the island a month and a half before the wedding in or-
der to meet the head priest in Athens and fill out all sorts of papers
and to meet with the two island priests, learn their ways and get
baptized. Yes, baptized! From a huge barrel filled with cold water
and olive oil poured all over me, which I was told not to wash off for
a week. Quite the experience in itself.
Things slowly but surely started to spin out of my control from that
point on. My parents, friends, relatives all started to arrive. The
hotels were completely unprepared and the list of inconvenient
mishaps continued to pile up. I was quickly seeing the reality of
this fiasco. My father was appalled by it all and took me aside to
talk some sense into me but, true to my stubborn self, I denied all
his words of warning and defied him by forging on ahead with it.
On top of all that, I just felt it was too late to back out now, after
everyone had travelled half way around the world for this event
and all the money spent. I’d prove them all wrong - Even myself.
(Ya, right.)
On the day of the wedding, while walking with my father up a road
16 laid in stone before the time of Christ, I was feeling the ancient
Greek magic. History was all around us and I was thinking how
right this all was...... until we got closer to the beautiful church
where my husband-to-be awaited. Oh yes, reality came crashing
down when first I saw this man. His much discussed expensive
custom tailored suit was in fact the equivalent of a cheap jungle
suit that he’d only just bought out of a cheap local island clothing
store the day before for fifty dollars. If that wasn’t bad enough,
he’d chosen to adorn the top of his partially bald head with a poor
In my case, I had just come off of an extremely disappointing relationship imitation of what one would maybe consider a toupee. I was horrified. Who
and found myself on the little blue and white Greek Kykladic island of Ios. was this man? Stubborn me suppressed my shock, still refusing to back
Contrary to other islands I’d visited, it was such a personable little paradise down. When my father handed me over to this comical rendition of Sotiris,
where the people were humble and friendly and I felt included and so at I basically just shut down and in a fog allowed myself to be led into the
home. Consequently, I extended my stay from one week to two. One hot, church. I can barely remember the extensive and long ceremony, only that
balmy evening while sitting in the small main square, a Greek bartender sat BOTH of the priests presided and that it was all done in Greek so I didn’t un-
down at my table and struck up a conversation. He wasn’t handsome but derstand any of it which frustrated me. But the most memorable bit of the
had that Greek forward friendliness that rendered me an idiot. I learned his whole fiasco was when, midway thru this intense ceremony, my oh-so-spe-
name was Sotiris and that he also shared my love of birds. The love of local cial betrothed made an exaggerated out-thrusting of his arm to expose his
wild bird life was the last straw for me. He led me up to the roof of the bar wrist watch, whereupon he pointedly took note of the time as if he had better
so as to experience the nightly mass congregation of Sparrows in the tall things to do. I was incredulous and shocked to the point of being speech-
Cypress tree growing next to the building. Yup, I was sold. He was sensi- less. Out of sheer self preservation, I chose to disregard it all, to pretend all
tive to my interests. Oh, the Greek men are good! was just fine and normal. Maybe he was just nervous?
We spent every night thereafter together. I’d hang out at his bar and go None the less, the reception was alright. Not what I’d hoped for but alright.
home with him to his tiny little one room studio with the rock hard bed. So Still in self-denial, I later found myself alone with my new citified Greek hus-
rustic. So different and so very romantic. We talked a lot in broken English. band at 3:30a.m., parked on the side of the road in a rented micro minivan
It all felt right. We discussed spending the rest of our lives together. Yes, making love for the first time as a married couple on our wedding night on
marriage. When it came time for me to leave the island, we shared all the the dirty floor of this cramped vehicle. After the unromantic and tedious
pertinent information and vowed to make further plans. deed was done, he left me on the floor while he took the slightly padded
Back in California I remained excited. Plans became reality. I bought a bench seat to sleep. That’s where I remained, awake, until the morning
beautiful traditional wedding dress and he told me in extensive detail about when he gained consciousness and drove us home.
his tedious appointments with the tailor, going as far as telling me about the Four months later I had successfully run him off. He was gone and I was
fabric and color of his wedding suit. And the price! Yes, he was not finan- happy, still on my favorite little island of Ios where I remained for the next 12
cially well off, so I was paying for most everything. Things at that time were years.
very inexpensive in Greece but the cost of the things he needed seemed I experienced my own baptism and marriage in Greece. Though it was a
outrageous to me, even in American terms. Yet I still sent him the money. failure, it was an experience that I ultimately am glad to have had, and in my
Why not? I was in love and wanted my first and only wedding to be just mind Sotiris wasn’t a part of it. At the end of the day, what I really gained
right. Sotiris promised that it would be. was wisdom and the 12 wonderful years being accepted by the Greeks as
Mid winter, 5 months before the wedding date, I went back to Greece, the one of their own on my beloved little island of Ios. I’ll forever belong to Ios
city of Athens where he and his cousin and aunts and uncles lived during as my second home. That’s priceless and made the short comical marriage
the winter months. I needed to be sure that he was still the man I wanted to all worthwhile.