Page 41 - Jo Dee C Jacob Girl Scouts CEO

Girl Puhlease! The Lies we Tell Ourselves in

Hopes Other Girls Will Believe Them

By Hannah Cunningham

As I teeter on the brink of 30 I’m starting to feel an insa- them to you because he got caught cheating or you tried to
tiable need to speak truths and surround myself with friends dump him for treating you like crap. Yea, I’m so suuure those
who are confident enough to do so. And yet, I remain to be flowers arrived “’just because.”’ Birthday and anniversary
the biggest hypocrite in a lot of ways. I’m drawn to all imag- flowers, fine, but “’just because flowers.,”’ I’m skeptical as
es of perfection and secretly long to be perfect in someone’s to why those even exist.
eyes. I also still love my friends and unless there’s
an extreme case of ‘I cannot believe you’re faking
it THIS much that your life is perfect.’ I have no
intention of dumping them as friends.
For instance, I love style, home, beauty and fashion
blogs where the protagonist’s life appears to be per-
fect. Hell, I even bad mouth the blogs I see where
the girl giving the fashion tip of the week looks
anything less than a pop star. I’ve noticed that the
most popular fashion, style, mommy, home, DIY
blogs all portray a glossy Martha Stewart-esque fin-
ish to them. They create a fantasy of perfection.
Just like Pinterest can make you feel like a mess
of a person because you don’t DIY (do it yourself)
holiday cards out of organic papyrus reed that you
grew and hand pressed ALL year long, or spend
hours building a marshmallow winter wonderland to
bring as a hostess gift to the holiday party you’re
attending [insert gag reflex here].
I love visiting glossy blogs (as I’m going to refer to
them from now on) and studying the photo updates
because I feel like I know the perfect little fam-
ily, in their perfect little house re-decorating their
formerly ho-hum living room from start to finish, San Diego Woman
while caring for their perfect little baby dressed in
perfect little outfits. It’s the stalker in me and the
dreamer in me and the writer/cynic in me all being
pulled to the forefront during my blog reviewing
experience. My imagination runs wild entering the 41
reality of someone else’s life as if I should know it
personally. The cynic in me creates scenarios (and
even dialogue) of who these people really are behind
the controlled stage of the blog, - and the dreamer
in me longs for IT ALL. My crazy says, “If I study
it hard enough I can re-create this. I can someday
portray my dream of the beautiful little home,
perfect husband and adorable baby.”. But the truth is there Imagine what a cooler world it would be if when you show
will ALWAYS be the illusions of perfections for the next step up to party and you ask Cynthia how things with her boy-
I don’t have. I went through it when everyone I knew from friend of 8 months are, she responds, “Generally good but
Iowa got married, and again when the rest of my San Diegan I’m struggling with this whole trying to figure out how to
friends are going through it now, but now we’ve upped the live together idea.” Instead I usually hear, “Things are soo
antie. It’s not just a husband in your 30s, it’s a husband, a good! They really are, they really are, they really are, like
house, and babies. sooosooooo good. How are things with you and your man?”
The glossy blogs remind me of Mad Men where 1950s house We’ve become conditioned to act this way because heaven
wives were perfectly done up to greet their husbands and forbid we should be experiencing a challenge in a relation-
make peanut butter sandwiches for their children all day. ship and expose ourselves. We’ve bought into the idea that
When behind closed doors they can’t even sit down because everyone who portrays perfection lives perfection, and there-
their dresses are so tight and/or they’re suffering from one fore how could we ever share anything less than sunshine and
hell of an identity crisis, having had to adopt the husband’s diamond rings? Catch my drift, yet?
identity for so long. Yes, I always try to follow the herd and still don’t know
Don’t get sucked into the “I’ll have what she’s showing off who I am, but at least I appreciate a good truth amidst the
on social media” either. Girl, Puhlease, you ain’t foolin’ no Pinterest layer cake lies girls tell on the daily. Being honest
one when your girls know you and your boyfriend are on the with your friends feels good and let’s you know who your true
rocks and you post a picture of flowers you received - caption friends are - fast.
reading: “So nice to get flowers from my honey just
because…” [Insert double gag reflex here]. Truth: he sent