Page 37 - Kimberly Hunt and daughter

I Don’t Want to Deal With It Lasso the Workplace Bull-y

By Donna Hulme
By Catherine Mattice, MA

Day in and day out, the bully Kate worked with attempted to or privacy where everyone could hear.
micromanage her and turn the boss against her. He picked Kate had to make a choice. She could ignore the email or
fights, harassed, and yelled at her. write an apology; but then she would be a victim again. Or
Kate’s mental health de- she could stand up
clined under the stress and for herself. So Kate
her anxiety increased almost decided to deliver
daily. After five years of abuse confidence up on a
Kate placed a tattered piece silver platter.
of paper above her alarm She clicked Reply
clock with the words “Get to All, acknowl-
up! Get up! Get up!” written edged (but did not
in blue highlighter. It was her apologize for) her
only source of inspiration; an mistake, provided
ever failing attempt at motivat- several options for
ing herself to get out of bed solution, and ad-
when the alarm went off. Her vised she was free
depression was increasing, as to discuss them
was the number of times she further in private.
hit the snooze button each Within seconds
morning. Ultimately, she was of hitting Send,
fired. Her once booming work her boss’ office
product and positive attitude door flew open; he
had wilted away with her self- marched straight
confidence. over to her, and
Research indicates up to 90% said, “Fantastic San Diego
of the workforce is bullied. In email Kate! Way Woman
fact, women are being bullied to put the hammer
by men and other women. down!”
Women targeted experience Kate demonstrated
anxiety, depression, burn- faith in herself de- 37
out and a multitude of other spite the mistake,
bad feelings. As a result, in and this develops
extreme cases, some even through repetitive
experience Post Traumatic affirmation. If you
Stress Disorder. Bullying is attend church, for
more damaging than sexual example, there’s a
harassment because it oc- good chance your
curs under the radar and faith is nurtured
therefore more frequently. each time you go.
Why? Because corporate The more informa-
policies cover more conspicu- tion you receive,
ous harassment aimed at a the more your cer-
protected class such as race, tainty is confirmed.
religion, and sexual orienta- If you stop going to
tion but often do not cover bullying. Organizations are also church, loss in faith may result. The same happens when we
much more likely to put a stop to sexual harassment, simply stop believing in ourselves.
because the law says they have to. But no law exists against So head to the Church of You each morning and stand in
workplace bullying. front of the mirror to shout your personal affirmations (“I
On the day Kate was fired she promised herself she would am terrific! I am great at my job! I will overcome the bully! I
never be that unhappy again. In her next position work days am not a helpless victim!”). The more you say it, the more
were happy and even fun, until she made a mistake in her you feel it; the more you feel it, the more you believe it; the
work. Her boss responded by sending a scathing email that more you believe it, the greater your courage becomes; the
he copied to the management team. He even heckled her as greater your courage becomes, the closer you are to lasso-
he walked by her desk’ this in an office with no cubicle walls ing the bully.
Issue 1, 2009