Page 90 - TheLeekLoserEdition_1

NOVEMBER 23, 2020
Dear Mr. Biden:
As the Boss Administrator of the U.S. General Services Administration, it is my responsibility to make post-election resources available to the presumed presidential winner even though I did not vote for you.
Frankly, I have never been in a “he said-he said” situation like this before. President Trump insists that he won, and you stole the election from him. Everyone else says that you won and Mr. Trump’s accusations are groundless. I didn’t know who to believe so I tossed a coin that happened to land on heads, in your favor. To be clear, my coin-toss decision was never pressured by any Executive Branch official, including those who work in the White House and the GSA. To be candid, a flood of threats aimed at me personally, my family, friends, staff and especially my pets, prompted my action.
Contrary to leaks, media reports and insinuations, I make no decisions based on fear, favoritism, fright, fables, feuds, food or quid pro quos. Nor do I release funds or briefings to an “apparent” president-elect when the current president’s personal attorney is working 24/7 to prove election fraud and abuse. The fact that no physical evidence of these crimes has been found is not in my wheelhouse.
Because the GSA is charged with federal procurement and property management, it must be intimately involved in determining the real winner of the presidential election. To be clear again, the legal citizens of our great country are procuring a president. See Section 7 of the Act and Public Law 116-159 dated October 1, 2020.