Page 16 - TheLeekCovidEdition_1

August 3, 2020 BREAKING NEWS
After visits to Texas and Florida last week against the advice of health officials, Donald Trump boasted in a tweet today:
“My visits last week to Texas and Frorida had massive numbers of cheering people along the roads and highways, thousands and thousands, even bigger (by far) than the crowds of 2016. Saw no Biden supporters, and yet some of the Fake News said it was an equal number. Sad!”
Aside from misspelling his adopted home state of Florida, the president’s observations and claims reached a new level of pomposity.
In an afternoon speech at Double Eagle Energy in Midland, the president tried to rally workers, threatening that the “radical left...is fighting to abolish American energy, destroy the oil and gas industries, and wipe out your jobs.
The president not only failed to acknowledge that the coronavirus had already resulted in the loss of 46,000 jobs in the Texas energy sector, he falsely proclaimed, “Now we’re back and we’re just gonna keep expanding. But if you don’t elect Republicans across the
board in November, oil and gas will become extinct in the GREATEST COUNTRY on the FACE of the EARTH!!! The leftwing mob will pass LAWS that FORCE YOU to WALK or ride a BICYCLE!!!”