Page 15 - EdViewptsSpring2020

how integral their relationship became. connect with a student, we are and coaches to form teams that
The connection these two share will reluctant to communicate with will provide support through the
last forever, and she will credit part him or her. We jump right to call- process. When kids see we are
of her ability to successfully complete ing a parent, having the student all coming around them to help
high school to him. removed from class or school, or them succeed, they will be more
When students are new to a school, issuing other discipline. It is im- likely to accept that help. Don’t go
it can take time to get to know their portant to recognize that students it alone!
personal stories, and, for many, we at all grade levels have their own 4. Be vulnerable. In Dare to Lead
will never fully know all they have perspectives and needs. Many Brené Brown advises, “We need
experienced. That is why it is so times, if we just ask what those to trust to be vulnerable, and we
important to ask questions, avoid are, students are willing to share need to be vulnerable to build
assumptions, and remain patient. so we can address the issues trust.” She goes on to discuss
The fact is we are the ones. We and provide solutions. Students that educators are charged with
are the ones our students rely on to will appreciate us giving them the creating a safe space where
understand them, guide them, and time to understand their point of our students can “take off the
protect them. They come to us with view, and it can be these mo- crushing weight of their armor,
such a wide variety of situations, we ments that are the foundation for hang it on the rack, and open
are truly fulfilling a multitude of roles some solid relationship building. their heart to truly being seen.”
in many students’ lives. We raise them 2. Investigate our own biases. It Our students will not feel this
up when they experience success takes a lot to go deep within our- safety and comfort if we are aloof,
and we pick them up when they work selves and question why we may indifferent, and rigid. They need
through failures. According to Dr. Lori have challenging experiences to experience our willingness to
Desautels and Michael McKnight in with a student. Is it because of share of ourselves in order to
Eyes are Never Quiet, even though that student’s social history? Did trust us enough to be vulnerable
our training may push us to merely we speak with a colleague who in return.
manage behaviors, label students, may have influenced our perspec- We spend over 35 hours a week with
exclude them, or issue discipline, we tive? Did we have a negative in- our students, and many need that
must look into the deeper causes and teraction with the student that has time with us. We are the ones that can
locate the roots. Our impulse is to look caused us to harbor resentment? change the trajectory of some of our
at finding ways to change the student, These are tough questions, but students’ lives. We may never be able
which assumes the solution is within ones that should be asked in to fully comprehend the impact we may
him or her; however, we must consider order to expose possible biases be having, but there are those small
the behavior could be pain-based. we may have and allow us to ad- moments we can hang onto to remind
Here are some tips educators can use dress them within ourselves. us. When a student stands in your
to reveal the underlying causes of stu- 3. Use a team approach. While it office the last day of school and thanks
dent behavior and provide the support is possible to feel isolated when you for believing in him when no one
our students so desperately need: it comes to trying to build con- else did, there is no greater gift.
nections with students, we must
1. Just talk (and listen). Many collaborate with parents, counsel-
times when we find it difficult to ors, colleagues, administrators,

References
Brown, B. (2018). Dare to lead: Brave work. Tough conversations. Whole hearts. Random House.
Desautels, L. & McKnight, M. (2019). Eyes are never quiet: Listening beneath the behaviors of our most troubled students.
Wyatt-MacKenzie Publishing.

About the Author

Michelle Papa is an Assistant Principal of Jefferson Township High School in Oak Ridge, New Jersey.
Prior to accepting this role, she was a Teacher of English in the same school. She is passionate about
the amplification of student voice, healthy school culture, trauma informed education, and equity for all
students. She has presented workshops on the topics of using digital tools for formative assessment,
text-dependent questioning, state testing rubrics. and the ALICE response to active shooter events. She
is also a Google Certified Level 2 Educator. Michelle is currently working toward completing an Ed.D. at
Rowan University. You can connect with her on Twitter at @MPapaEdu.

Educational Viewpoints -13- Spring 2020