Page 115 - Likutei Tipshim

MANAGING YOUR TIME
HALACHIC CORNER

Are you doing the daf? Would you like to set aside time everyday,
but are unsure how much time you will need? You can learn some Zmanim for Purim 5782
dafs quickly and others can take a long time. Announcing, Art Rolls TIME TO ADMIT YOUR GETTING OLD
newest app, Waze for the Daf. Just put in the daf you want to learn,
and which meforshim you want and it will figure out how much time According to 15 year olds When you get your drivers license As an exercise in achdus, all the shuls on Touhy Avenue will be swapping
you will need. With our advance feature, you can specify which beis According to 29 year olds When you turn 30 buildings every week until Rosh Hashanah. Check your email for where
medresh (or home) you will be learning in and it will factor in the According to 40 year olds When you say something to your you will be davening each week.
sociability quotient (friend, employer, spouse, resident batlan). For kids that your mother said to you, Gedalia Goomber (builder, locomotive engineer, astronaut, Shabbos ob-
more information or to download, go to and you always hated it. server, African explorer) implores the community, if you see a good vort
www.doIhavetimeforthedafnow.com According to 50 year olds You know all the answers, but no- share it with someone and bring redemption to the world. Remember if
body asks the questions. you SEE SOMETHING SAY SOMETHING.

KOLLEL LEEBE B’MIZRACH According to 60 year olds You hear your favorite songs in an bernie sanders ( socialist, radical, arm chair anarchist) implores everyone
(avreichim, yungeleit, talmidei chachamim) elevator to only use lowercase letters and join him as an anti-capitalist.
According to 70 year old It takes two tries to get up from the Increase your concentration during davening. Learn techniques to focus
couch
QUESTIONS FROM OUR ANONYMOUS HELP LINE better. The Kavanah Institute of America is offering ( I really should think about
According to 80 year olds It takes longer to rest than it did to what I’m saying when I daven) a series of talks on maximizing ( my portfolio isn’t doing
Have a question you would like to ask anonymously, call get tired. well. I better call my broker to maximize my return) our davening experience ( that was a
800-for-afr-iend According to 90 year olds you know what a party line is and I great chazen we had last night). Register now for the KIA Davening Initiative, (I

Q: I’m considering making aliya, but I understand the mitzvos don't mean political better take my KIA in for an oil change soon, where are my keys?)
hatluyos b’aretz are currently d’rabanan. As such, we have some LOSHEN HARA The AMA is looking for people to join our class action suit against politi-
leniencies to rely on. Once the majority of Jews (Yiddin, Hebrews, People are familiar with the concept that loshen hora said in front of 3 cians for practicing medicine without a license 888-MAND-ATE.
members of the tribe) live in Israel, they will become d’oraisa.
What if I’m the one that will tilt the scale to a majority of Jews people can be repeated. While “heard immunity” has some protection, Starting this Purim and every Thursday for the next 3 weeks, join us for a
living in Israel? Will I be over the aveira of lifnai eevair? Will my the only way to be totally safe is to follow the CDC (Change Direction series on healthy eating and maintaining a healthy lifestyle. Learn life
in Communication) guidelines and triple mask so no one can under-
actions cause thousands of Jews (Yiddin, Hebrews, members of the hacks, such as: Chocolate has very little nutrition so you have to eat a lot
tribe) to be over a d’oraisa? Maybe I should stay in America (land of stand you. of it.
the free, home of the brave, medina shel chesed) ? Sensitive Speech Chicago. Being sensitive to each other is both important

A: In all the years our Kollel has been answering shaylos, we have ITEMS THAT IDENTIFY AS TIPSHIM and at times challenging. We might think we are being sensitive when in
to admit this is the most original reason for not making aliya. After Maybe if we start telling people their brain is an app, they’ll want to truth it’s the opposite. For example: Say you are standing in line to get a
much deliberation, we came to a consensus. In order to avoid any use it. coffee and a vegan customer behind you says “You know the milk you are
responsibility, when you land in Israel find a friend (or your spouse) putting in your coffee was meant for a calf”. Responding by saying, “It’s
and walk off the plane together. This is based on a teshuva from I don't mean to brag, but I finished my 14-day diet food supply in 3 not a problem, as you ate the calf for dinner last night”, is not the most
delicate response. For more insightful and sensitive skills, be sure to sign
Rabbi Notme (gadol, posek, guiltless, innocent) in his classic sefer, hours and 20 minutes.
What Me Worry? where he writes to always do things in pairs as I’ve written a song about a tortilla. Well, it’s more of a wrap. up.
shnayim she-asuha is patur. Tonight’s protest, organized to protest Murphy’s law, has been cancelled
When does a joke become a Dad joke? due to torrential rains.
PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENTS When the punchline becomes apparent.

Now that we are back to being maskless, please remember to cover When does the punchline become apparent? Help fight assimilation! With the obsession with sushi of late, we are
your mouth when you yawn. After the delivery. abandoning our heritage. Join the Sunday morning Bagels and Lox move-
ment. (Bagels and Lox Matter)!!
The ACA, American Chiropractic Association would like to warn It’s hard explaining puns to kleptomaniacs because they’re always
you: If you fall asleep on top of old magazines, you will wake up taking things literally. By law, you must turn on your headlights when it’s raining in Sweden.
with back issues. I was wondering why the frisbee kept getting bigger and bigger, but The question is how are you supposed to know when it is raining in Swe-
den?
Worrying has been proven very ineffective at solving problems. then it hit me.

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