Page 40 - Advanced Romance

Advanced Romance* 37
decision by the day that they request. Courage, courage and more courage.
Or you can make a definite decision that you
don’t want to decide yet, or that you want to keep
the relationship light. This answer may also lose your loved one, but if it’s the truth, then so be it. Either the one needing clarity will go elsewhere, or be willing to live with the indefiniteness. From my experience, lots of relationships slouch along like that and eventually evolve in to long-lasting loves. Many couples who’d been problematic are still problematic now—but doing well enough.
Or you can hedge about what you want and see what happens. Sometimes that works out for the best
All this of course is way easier said than done.
Regardless, if you’ve really faced the reality of the 50% divorce rate then you will always be prepared for your relationship to change. You will have cultivated your exes, so they are still friends if they were healthy enough people, and you will have other attractive, relative strangers with whom you are somewhat friendly. That way the railroading partner cannot threaten that you will be completely alone if they dump you, and assert that you will be completely cut-off from the life-giving energy that crossing sexual border lines can provide. Be it a satisfyingly intimate (but not sexual) telephone call, a movie or coffee, or a long walk in the neighborhood, or a long walk to forever.