Page 16 - Nihil Alchemia CRUCIBLE Issue One MAY 2020 Flip Book

WHITE GLOW I reach for my mobile phone that is sitting

on top of the book next to my bed. I press
SARAH YULE into the button on the right side and
the screen lights up to greet me with
the newest update: “Coronavirus takes
another 100 lives.” My brain begins to pick
up an anxious pace, repeating the worst
case scenarios; “Will I die today?”, “Will I
see my grandparents again?” then I close
my eyes. I focus on the rustling from the
I wake up and look at the white wall ahead trees in an attempt to ground myself
of me, which is coated in shadows created back in my body. The sun’s glow heats my
by the flickering leaves hanging from the left cheek and I take a sip of water as I
tree outside. For a moment everything is feel the ice brush against my teeth.

peaceful, the birds are chirping cheerfully I glance down at my wrist to catch a look
and the sun is rising to its daily spot. I at the time, it’s 11:00am. I know I should
think to myself, “The world is beautiful.” go to the shop soon or else the thought
Then, I stretch my legs over the soft will prey on my mind for the rest of the
blanket and poke them out onto the chilly, day. I put on comfy clothes, some loose
wooden floor. My eyes scan the room for leggings and a pink t-shirt. The fabric is
a cosy jumper to put on and then I see it, tender and eases the panic that’s rising
perched on top of the fridge projecting a in my body. I take my black bag and head
dull white glow as the early morning sun towards the door. Out of the corner
of my eye I see the white glow pulsing,
bounces off it. White, the colour of peace reminding me that I need to take it. I
and hope, suddenly becomes something take a deep breath and grab it in a swift
frightening. I direct my attention back movement. I throw it into my bag and

to the wall and the flickering leaves to scout the rest of my things making sure I
remind myself of outside, where there haven’t forgotten anything.
is space and nature. Then I realise I need
to go to the supermarket and my palms As I take a step outside, the rustling
leaves that I could see from my window
break into a sweat. The throbbing white now tower over me, like warm arms
glow in the corner of the room stares me protecting a newborn. Even when the
in the face, taunting me with its presence world is chaotic, mother nature is a
and sending white sparks that set off the constant comfort. Instead of focusing

anxiety in my head. on the beady eyes luring at me each time
someone passes by, I direct my gaze to
the golden retriever running across
the park. Its bark helps numb the anxiety
whispering in my ear, “You are going to
get it.” I approach the end of the street
and freeze. The white glow is peering out
from my bag as I look down to the floor.
The shop is only half a street away and I
know I need to put it on soon.