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to acquire. For our purposes here it is important to think about the basic
tenants of the process. They include:

• Clarifying the problem;

• Having the necessary information ready to discuss the
problem;

• Developing and evaluating alternative solutions; and,

• Coming to agreement through a back-and-forth process of
discussion.

Using a problem-solving approach can lessen the effect of emotions and

spontaneous reactions on an informal negotiation. Inherent in a successful
resolution of conflict at a casual level is effective communication, and a
high level of trust, understanding, acceptance, and commitment to the
relationship. Attitude is everything.

In order for the resolution of disagreement or conflict to take place and to
endure, it must be based on an improvement of the relationship between
the parties involved. People are most likely to cooperate in resolving
conflict when they know that they will deal with each other again in the
future. The expectation of future interactions encourages people to work

cooperatively with one another in the present. Concern for the durability
of the relationship ensures that people will not easily forget about how
they have treated, and been treated by, one another in future interactions.

The importance of good working relationships was reinforced in a study by

John Kotter of hundreds of managers in many different settings. He
concluded that:

Good working relationships based on some combination of respect,
admiration, perceived need, obligation, and friendship are a critical source of
power in helping to get things done. Without these relationships, even the
best possible idea could be rejected or resisted in an environment where
diversity breeds suspicion and interdependence precludes giving orders to

most of the relevant players. Furthermore, since there relationships serve as
important information channels, without them one may never be able to

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