Page 62 - Like No Business I Know

Beige

the case of the physiological syndromes caused by poor diet and
inactivity, few of us are willing to make the effort to establish good
habits. And there is no money to be made in promoting such advice.
Our populace is already conditioned to spend plenty for quick fixes,
and to repeat them once the inevitably temporary benefit wears off.”
“So: allopathy and TD. All of these modalities—other than the
rapidly self-defeating recourse to drugs and alcohol—involve
generating real or false excitement. Gambling and other intensely
competitive pastimes, high-risk sports, illicit and/or high-turnover
sexual liaisons, travel to exotic places, running from one spiritual
guru to the next—all these activities, like crash diets and ‘weekend
warrior’ bouts of exercise, lead in most cases to exhaustion and
failure, followed by adoption of another sure-fire road to salvation.
This chart shows a success rate of allopathic methods at less than ten
percent: note that this figure is merely an estimate, as no official study
has been made of TD and its attempted cures. Let me repeat:
temporal dysphoria sounds like a medical term, but it has no more
scientific validity than many of the conditions for which the
pharmaceutical industry has marketed its products. The point is that
the clientele exists, it is created by social trends which are not going
away soon, and that the answer lies not in allopathy but in
homeopathy.”
“The next slide shows the homeopathic remedy for TD: Beige.
Some of you may be familiar with the treatment of conventional
diseases known as ‘homeopathy,’ but the term simply means inducing
a healing response by the application of a substance producing the
same results as the ailment. This is what vaccination accomplishes in
advance, inoculation via stimulation of the body’s immune response.
The theory is that by subjecting the body to a different but similar
pathogen the proper reaction will be produced, leading to remission
if not cure. Sid Arthur saw that temporal dysphoria might be
amenable to homeopathy. He set about developing a methodology
for applying extreme boredom to TD sufferers. That might sound
simple on the face of it: anyone can duplicate conditions of boredom.
Go home and try it if you don’t believe me! You will fail because you
won’t do it right and because you can’t do it on your own. Sid, after a
lot of research and experimentation, hit upon the correct
combination of variables necessary to make it work.”

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