Page 116 - Reason To Sing by Kelita Haverland

Reason To Sing

I fall to my knees, remembering a few weeks earlier when I
had offered the most difficult prayer of my life: God, please take
Mommy, I had begged for mercy. We can’t stand to see her suffer
anymore. I don’t want her to go but it’s devastating for Vian and
me to see her this way. Please God, take her soon. Take her out of her
misery.
I had found the courage to pray for the exact thing I did
not want. And yet I knew it was what my mother would want.
I knew she was dying. And I knew the pain was too much. I
knew I had to let her go.
And yet now, with the moment I had prayed for at hand, an
unimaginable agony has taken over me. The debilitating sorrow
of seeing my beloved mother take her final breath has literally
brought me to my knees.
She is gone. It is done. My prayer has been answered.
As Vian falls into my arms on the floor, we hold on to each
other for dear life.
Are we orphans now?

Deep Need

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