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Sefer Chafetz Chayim VOL-4 13 םייח ץפח רפס
Ilustrative Examples םירויצ
Example 9 ט רויצ

more so than someone who has more means). (2) The observer תוֹחוּטּבּ ןָתּחְמהֵמ איִצוֹהל ךְיא ץֵעיְתיֶּשׁ ,ןָתחל תלעוֹתּ
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must have the foreknowledge that the groom would not go ahead
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with the engagement if he learned of this information, since often ןָתחה םגּ םִאדּ ,היִּמרְ היהִתּ אלֹ ןָתחה דצִּמֶּשׁ )ג .)הז לע
we find that the groom’s intent in marrying this girl is only to try to רוּסאדּ טוּשׁפוּ ,הזבּ הז אצי ,היהיֶּשׁ ןינִע הזיאבּ וּהֵמּרְַמ
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get as much as he could out of her father and that the engagement
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does not depend at all on that information. In this circumstance it םיִטרְָפּה ראְשׁ )בי( הֶזָל ןֵכּ םַגּ ךְירִָצ הֶז דַבְלוּ .וֹל תוֹלַּגְל
is obvious that this leniency allowing the observer to go and tell ןנוֹבְּתיֶּשׁ רחא םִא יִכּ ,תוֹלּגל רהמל ןיא ןכּ לע .ל"נּה
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the groom what he knows is not relevant (the report is forbidden)
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(unless he realizes that the report will be beneficial to the groom .וּנבַתכֶּשׁ םירִבדּה לכּ וּמלְשׁנ יִכּ ,הזבּ בֵטיה
(11), that the groom will seek advice on how to obtain from his
father in law the security for his promised pledges). (3) From the
groom’s perspective, there is no deception in this approach; that
if the groom was deceiving the bride’s father in some issue, the םייח םימ ראב
one deception offsets the other deception and it is obvious that
disclosure of that report to the groom is forbidden. Besides, in this םיטרפה ראש ךירצ הזב םגו .ןתחל תלעות )אי(
circumstance one must fulfill all of the remaining conditions (12) הזב ךירצד הארנ םגו ,'ב ףיעס 'ט ללכב ל"נה
written above. Therefore one should not rush to make these kinds
of disclosures unless all of the conditions for disclosure are first .ךומסבד 'גה טרפה
reviewed and satisfied.
האנואה תא לידגי אלש ונייה .םיטרפה ראש )בי(
דצמ אלו ןתחה תלעותל קר ןיוכיו ,איהש הממ רתוי
Be’er Mayim Chayim ףיעס 'ט ללכב םש םירכזנה םירבדה רתיו ,האנש
(E3/8/1)-(11) .. beneficial to the groom: Also, in this case, one must 'גה ולאב ללכנ םש רכזנה ןושארה טרפו .ש"יע 'ב
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first fulfill all of the conditions discussed above in the 2 halacha of the 9
Kelal. It also seems to me that he must additionally conform to the next .הפ ונבתכש םיטרפ
(third) condition mentioned above in the Mekor Chayim.
(E3/8/2) – (12) ..all of the remaining conditions: Namely, not to
exaggerate the deception and that his motivation must be to benefit the םייחה רוקמ
groom and not for reasons of personal hatred. The remaining conditions
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(to be fulfilled) were mentioned there in the 9 Kelal, in the 2 halacha. ,ןינִעה יִפל ריִכּמ אוּהו ,וֹמִּע ךְדַּתְּשׁנ רבכּ םִאו .ט
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The first condition listed there is included in these three conditions written
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here. יוּלָתּ .תוֹנוֹזְמּה וֹא ןדנּה ןינִעבּ ןָתחה תא המּרַי ןָתּחְמהֶשׁ
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,ןָתחה ינזאבּ וּלבּקְַתי אלֹ וירָבדֶּשׁ ,האוֹר אוּה םִא )גי( ,הֶזָבּ
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Mekor Hachayim ןָתּחְמה דגנ ץֵעיְתִהל הארְיֶּשׁ ,וּניהדּ ,דבל שֹחל ןינִעל קרַ
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E3/9. If the engagement has already taken place and the observer הֶשֲׂעי אלֹ ןָתחהֶשׁ עדֵוֹי אוּהֶשׁ וֹא ,וֹתוֹמּרַל לכוּי אלֶֹּשׁ
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\ speaker realizes from the circumstances that the prospective
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