Page 61 - Relationships101 A Guide To Building Healthy Relationships Final 1

Healthy Tips for Handling Your Relationship:

Know yourself, be honest with yourself and love yourself––first! Only then can you
truly appreciate and love someone else.

Take good care of yourself. Treat yourself with the same respect and love you would
treat your partner. Conduct yourself with dignity, even if you are very familiar with one
another. Do not exclude your partner from your life; it will only cause resentment.

All good relationships are based upon mutual respect. If you do not respect your
partner, or believe your partner is losing respect for you, then consider ways of rebuilding it.
Respect is the key. If you have respect for one another, then nothing can go wrong.
Sometimes it can take a while to achieve, but if your partner truly loves you, respect will
come.

Ask questions. Clarify, do not assume. Do not talk if your mind is not clear or full of
anger. When you feel hurt, do not say, "it's your fault,” “you never loved me,” “let’s break
up," or "when do you want to break up?” You might well regret it one day. Tell them you
feel hurt and ask for clarification first. If you do not work together and just blame the other
person, it can only do harm. Never just withdraw; this always causes more harm than good.

Treat your partner the way you want to be treated. Be gentle and kind. Apologize if
your partner feels hurt, but do not let them make you feel bad. Giving an apology does not
mean you are a weak person; it only means you care. When you are full of anger, it will
surely burst out of your mouth if you open it. Calm down first, think it through, and then try
to talk. When your partner asks to be left alone, do not blame or criticize them. Show your
respect and support by giving them time and space to calm down and think it through first.
But do not leave any unsolved problem alone for too long.

Be the first to tell your partner how you feel, either positively or negatively. Trust is
as essential as respect. If you want your partner to trust you, trust them first. Making your
partner play guessing games may lead to misunderstanding and frustration. Do not just tell
them, talk about the issue; talk about your plan to solve it. Exclusion breeds distrust.

Strike while the iron is cold. Know when to be reflective and invoke principles.
There is no use in trying to teach fire safety principles when the house is already burning.

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