Page 83 - SILFlip

One way of addressing this concept is by telling you what this doesn’t mean. It doesn’t mean that partners in love relationship do not have equal value or worth as individuals — we should all have equal value or worth as individuals across everything in civilized societies.
What the statement above means is that different people have different needs. I might need a lot of hugs and kisses to be happy but my partner might not. My partner might need more personal space or private time than me. One of us might need to talk about how we are feeling more than the other. In these ways and many others our needs could be different—sometimes very different. Maintaining equity and balance requires that we know how we are alike and how we are different and appreciating the dedication it takes to:
• Respect those differences
• Give our partner what they need to stay balanced, nourished and
appreciated. This has to happen from both sides of the relationship.
These differences really do not take much to address and start to change the direction — but it can often be very difhicult to encourage people to address because the hirst thing that needs to be accomplished is a shift in focus, from the “me” to the “we.” That shift is what overcomes the inertia that is a barrier to change. We all get comfortable with being uncomfortable.
Staying in Love: Secret Recipes For Making Love Last 83