Page 129 - YOU CAN WIN - SHIV KHERA

RokZRooM Special ! You Can Win by Shiv Khera

their fun by putting others down. Sarcasm alienates people. It is a good idea to keep
humor low risk.

Step 25: To Have a Friend, Be a Friend

We keep looking for the right employer, the right employee, spouse, parent, child, and so
on. We forget that we have to be the right person too. Experience has shown that there is
no perfect person, no perfect job, no perfect spouse. When we look for perfection, we are
disappointed because all we find is that we traded one set of problems for another set of
problems. Having lived in the West for over 20 years, I have observed that with the high
divorce rate the way it is, people find after they get married for the second time that their
new spouse doesn't have the problems of the first one but has a totally new set of
problems. Similarly, people change jobs or fire employees looking for the right one only
to find that they traded one set of problems for another. Let's try and work around these
challenges and make divorcing or firing the last rather than the first resort.

Sacrifice

Friendship takes sacrifice. Building friendships and relationships takes sacrifice, loyalty,
and maturity. Sacrifice takes going out of one's way and never happens by the way.
Selfishness destroys friendships. Casual acquaintances come easy but true friendships
take time to build and effort to keep. Friendships are put to tests and when they endure,
they grow stronger. We must learn to recognize counterfeit relationships. True friends do
not want to see their friends hurt. True friendship gives more than it gets and stands by
adversity.

Fair-Weather Friend

A fair-weather friend is like a banker who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining
and takes it back the minute it rains.
Two men were traveling through the forest and came across a bear. One of them quickly
climbed a tree but the other was unable to, so he lay on the ground and played dead.
The bear sniffed around his ear and left. The fellow from the tree came down and asked
him, "What did the bear tell you?" The man replied, "He said, don't trust a friend who
deserts you in danger." The message is as dear as daylight.
Mutual trust and confidence are the foundation stone of all friendship.

People Make Friends for Different Motives

Friendships can be categorized as follows:

1. Friendship of pleasure. You are a friend so long as the relationship is entertaining and
fun, i.e., a fair weather friend.
2. Friendship of convenience. This is where people make friendships to gain favors.
These friendships last until the usefulness of the other person ends. These friendships
are not permanent.
3. True friendship. This is based on mutual respect and admiration. True friends are
people who have the good of each other at heart and act accordingly. Good deeds
come back to us in the form of good friends. There is lasting goodness on both sides.
It is based on character and commitment.

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