Page 10 - Testify 1-14 Nov 2020

10 1 - 14 November 2020

Children’s corner

LOT’S WIFE She tried slamming the door again, The child looked at her and calmly MAKING BABIES George: Here it is!
The Sunday School teacher was really put her back into it, but with stated, “I have Jesus in my heart. A mummy just told her little girl all
describing how Lot’s wife looked the same result -- the door bounced Barney is on my underwear.” about the making of babies. Little Teacher: Correct. Now, class, who
back and turned into a pillar of salt, back open. Annie is now silent for a while. discovered America?
when little Johnny interrupted. KINDERGARTEN
Convinced these were rude young My youngest child was thrilled “You understand it now?” mummy Class: George!
“My mummy looked back once people sticking their foot in the when her turn came to enter kin- asks.
while she was DRIVING,” he an- door, she reared back to give it dergarten. To make sure that we MARRIAGE
nounced triumphantly, “and she a slam that would teach them a had plenty of time to eat breakfast “Yes,” replies her daughter. Two teen-age brothers were dis-
turned into a telephone pole!” lesson, when one of them said, and get ready on the first day, I cussing marriage.
“Ma’am, before you do that again woke everybody early -- so early “Do you still have any questions?”
BEING HELPFUL you need to move your cat.” that it was still dark. Chris: I want to marry a smart wom-
Two church teens were going door “Yes, how about little kittens? How an, a good woman, and a woman
to door, and knocked on the door WHERE’S BARNEY? I was dressing when my little does that work?” who’ll make me happy.
of a woman who was not happy to A precocious 4-year-old was daughter came into my room look-
see them. brought to the Accident & Emer- ing troubled. “In exactly the same way as with Brian: The older brother said,
gency unit of the hospital with a human babies.” “Make up your mind.”
She told them in no uncertain terms severe cough. She kept up a non- “What’s wrong?” I asked, mus-
that she did not want to hear their stop conversation while the nurse tering as much cheerfulness as I “Wow!” the girl exclaims. “My dad- FAIR FIGHT?
message and slammed the door in was trying to listen to her lung could at that hour. dy can do ANYTHING!” Nine-year-old Aaron came home
their faces. sounds. Finally, the nurse said, from the playground with a bloody
“Shhh, I have to hear if Barney is She blurted out, “You didn’t tell me GEOGRAPHY CLASS nose, black eye, and torn clothing.
To her surprise, however, the door in there.” I was going to night school!” Teacher: George, go to the map It was obvious he’d been in a bad
did not close and, in fact, bounced and find North America. fight and lost. While his father was
back open. patching him up, he asked his son
what happened.
“Well, dad,” said Aaron, “I chal-
lenged Larry to a duel. And, you
know, I gave him his choice of
weapons.”

“Uh-huh,” said the father, “that
seems fair.”

“I know, but I never thought he’d
choose his sister!”
FLOWERS
The Sunday School teacher was
teaching a lesson on creation to a
class of children. “Now, children,”
she said, “Who can tell us what
makes the flower spring from the
seed?”

“God does it,” answered one little
girl, “but fertiliser helps.”

CRAPS OKAY -
BUT NO PRAYING?
A teacher went into her classroom
fifteen minutes before the class
was supposed to begin and caught
a bunch of boys down in a hud-
dle on their knees in the corner of
the room. She demanded to know
what they were doing, and one of
them hollered back, “We’re shoot-
ing craps.”

She said, “Oh, that’s all right. I was
afraid you were praying.”