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FACE TO FACE | EASTERN HORIZON 27

I get to actually practice patience when my children lives—depend on insects. The belief that an insect is
are dawdling—taking an hour to eat dinner because other, that is has nothing to with us, is a misperception
they keep leaving the table, or needing to be reminded of reality. And there are so many things like this. There
seven times to clean their rooms. Losing my temper are so many things supporting our lives, which we don’t
isn’t effective. So, the question is always, how can I generally appreciate. Understanding interdependence
patiently use skillful means to teach my kids to take can allow us and our children to see the big picture,
responsibility? Sometimes this feels like koan I can’t to see that something that happens on one strand
solve. At other times, I look at my kids in amazement of the web of life is going to reverberate, perhaps
because they are such wonderful, little humans— catastrophically, on all the other strands.
conscientious and caring. I suppose that they are just
like the rest of us: They are perfect, and they could just This brings me to karma, another Buddhist teaching
use a little improvement. that we—and future generations—need to gain insight
into. Do we choose to drive our car when we could walk?
Having children has also offered me another window Do we buy nonorganic fruit when we could afford to do
into suffering and impermanence. When my daughter otherwise? Do we buy a bunch of plastic junk for our kids
was a newborn, I was once holding her when I was loot bags? Seemingly small actions have consequences.
suddenly struck with the realization that one day—
if she’s lucky enough to have a long life—she will You wrote the book Awakening the Heart.
eventually become a frail, old woman. I immediately What’s the key message of this book? Any other
teared up. The crushing thing was that I will not be publications on the way soon?
there to comfort and care for her when she is old. This
is always the most tender, painful thing about being a People often talk about Buddhism as being about
parent: we need to confront our limitations in shielding suffering and the end of suffering. So I’m hoping that
our children from suffering, old age, sickness, and death. people who read Awakening My Heart gain a few more
When they’re little, children might see their parents as tools in their toolbox for ending suffering and cultivating
all powerful, but we are not. happiness, and I mean that at both the personal and
societal level. The questions that are explored include,
As children grow to be teenagers and adults, they how can we be more compassionate to self and other?
will find the world a much different and difficult How can we be really present for our lives? And how to
place compared to when they were in primary work with anger and other difficult emotions? Hopefully
school or under the care of parents. What Buddhist readers are able to digest some of that and, as a result,
values can we instill in them so that they can be a they become just a little bit happier, kinder, and more
basis of support in life when they face the world? inspired to make the world a better place.

I often think about how my children will very likely I also just hope people find it a fun read. Awakening My
spend their lives grappling with the effects of climate Heart is a collection of articles, essays, and interviews
change and the loss of biodiversity. To face these that I did for Lion’s Roar. It includes my interviews with
challenges effectively, they will need wisdom. Tina Turner, Ram Dass, and Jane Goodall; reported
Our children need—and we need—to have insight pieces, such as my braided profile of Zen teacher Bernie
about the interdependent nature of our world. Maybe, Glassman and Hollywood star Jeff Bridges; and personal
for example, we think insects are disgusting or we stories, such as my experiences of going on pilgrimage
don’t think about them at all. But they are the sole in India and of attending a retreat with Pema Chödrön.
food source of many animals; they’re important Now, I’m working with an agent on a new book. So far,
decomposers; and they pollinate many of our fruits I’ve only written a few pages, so I’m keeping it under
and vegetables. Our ecosystem—and therefore our wraps. We’ll see where it goes. EH