Page 129 - You Only Live Once [BooksLD]
P. 129
move out of the bathroom but keep lying on the floor, my eyes closed, my
mind unable to think anymore.
After a few minutes, I feel that I should stop right away for I might cause
damage that I’ll repent for years. And if I die, I would cause damage that
the world would repent for years.
‘I won’t do the same,’ I scream as I catch hold of the loose strands of my
hair and pull them back, forcefully placing them behind my ears.
I stand up and pull out the wooden box. That’s all my mom, who perhaps
loved me deeply, has left behind. I go through the songs, scribbled pages,
everything.
In that very moment it strikes me that I have been gifted, gifted with the
ingenious ability to translate these moments into songs and help a million
others who may be contemplating ‘death’ in this moment, every moment. I
could save a few, if not millions. I realize that I am sent to this world with a
purpose and I am lucky enough to discover it at a young age.
But this isn’t exactly the person within me who tells me this. It is actually
my mom who left this letter behind. She loved me immensely and I can’t let
her down. Who knows if the whole theory that souls don’t die is true? My
soul is connected to hers as it is to a million others. We’re all bound by the
force of love. And this is how my soul chooses to convince me when I am
at my lowest.
I eventually decide to surrender to it, listen to it, like I always do. It is
said that the collective consciousness of humanity knows the future, directs
the future, that it is all written, and that I would have to finish the album.
When I listen to the voice within me, I contemplate life. Not just tonight.
Every time.
I listen to the soul and choose not to talk any further. The worship is
done. I feel as if I have regained all my energy, and I wipe my tears as I
prepare myself for a new dawn.
Aarav knocks on the door. ‘Alara, I love you. I promise to be with you
through this! Tell me, what is the matter with you?’
‘You’ve come here at the right time,’ I say as I open the door and hug
him.
‘Why did you leave abruptly without informing me. Is all good? Parvathi
told me that you left for Maria’s.’