Page 38 - Mindmail _June_2019
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‘Shall I say “Refused”?’        Singh. ‘I have lived without    watchman at the gate.                             him with mild amusement         don’t laugh at a madman,       derived the inspiration for
           asked the postman. ‘No,         a single remark being           Some people were sitting                          in their eyes. The assistant    for who knows, you will        it from a memory of his
           no,’ said Singh. ‘Just take it   made against me, all my        on sofas reading books                            kindly put his arms on his      also be mad when you           own village days. It was
           back and say you have not       life. Now!’ He shuddered        and journals. They turned                         shoulder and led him out.       come to make clay dolls,’      the most enjoyable piece
           found me . . .’                 at the thought of it. ‘I knew   and threw a brief look at                         ‘You get well first, and then   and charged into their         of work that he had so far
                                           I was getting into trouble      him and resumed their                             come back. I tell you—you       midst with a war cry. When     undertaken. He lived in a
            ‘That I can’t do . . .’        when I made that office         studies. As Singh stood                           are not all right.’             he saw children coming         kind of ecstasy while doing
           wsaid the postman,              model . . .’ After deeper       uncertainly at the doorway,                                                       out of a school, he felt it    it. ‘I am going to keep this
           looking serious.                reflection he said, ‘Every      an assistant came up and                          Walking back home, he           would be nice to amuse         for myself. A memento
                                           time I took something           asked, ‘What do you want?’                        pondered over it. ‘Why are      their young hearts by          of my father’s village,’ he
           Singh seemed to have no         there, people crowded           Singh gave a salute, held                         they all behaving like this,    behaving like a tiger. So he   declared. ‘I will show it at
           option but to scrawl his        round, stopped all work         up the letter uncertainly                         as if I were a madman?’         fell on his hands and knees    an exhibition, where they
           signature and receive the       for nearly an hour . . . That   and muttered, ‘Can I                              When this word came             and crawled up to them         will give me a medal.’ He
           packet. He sat gloomily—        must also have reached          know what is inside this?’                        to his mind, he stopped         with a growl.                  guarded it like a treasure:
           gazing at the floor. His wife  the Sahib’s ears.’               The assistant made the                            abruptly in the middle of                                      when it was wet he never
           who had gone out and just                                       obvious suggestion. But                           the road and cried, ‘Oh!        He went home in a              allowed his wife to walk
           returned saw him in this        He wandered about               Singh replied, ‘They said                         That’s it, is that it?—Mad!     terrifying condition. His      within ten yards of it. ‘Keep
           condition and asked, ‘What      saying the same thing,          you could tell me what’s                          Mad!’ He shook his head         wife, who was grinding         off, we don’t want your foot
           is it?’ His voice choked as     with the letter in his          inside without opening                            gleefully as if the full truth   chilli in the back yard,      dust for this village . . .’
           he replied, ‘It has come.’ He  pocket. He lost his taste        it—’ The assistant asked,                         had just dawned upon him.       looked up and asked,
           flung at her the registered     for food, wandered about        ‘Where do you come                                He now understood the           ‘What is this?’ His hair was   Now, in his madness,
           letter. ‘What is it?’ she       unkempt, with his hair          from?’ Singh explained                            looks that people threw         covered with street dust;      he looked down on it.
           asked. He said, ‘How            standing up like a halo—an      his life, work and outlook,                       at him. ‘Oh! oh!’ he cried      his body was splashed with  He raised his foot and
           should I know. Perhaps our      unaccustomed sight, his         and concluded, ‘I’ve lived                        aloud. He laughed. He           mud. He could not answer       stamped everything down
           ruin . . .’ He broke down.      years in military service       without remark all my                             felt a curious relief at this   because he choked with         into a multicoloured jam.
           His wife watched him for a      having given him a habitual  life. I knew trouble was                             realization. ‘I have been       mirth as he said, ‘Fancy       They were still half-wet.
           moment, went in to attend       tidiness. His wife lost all     coming—’ There were                               mad and didn’t know it . .      what has happened!’            He saw a donkey grazing
           to some domestic duty and  peace of mind and became             tears on his cheeks. The                          .’ He cast his mind back.                                      in the street. He gathered
           returned, still found him       miserable about him.            assistant looked at him                           Every little action of his      ‘What is it?’                  up the jam and flung it
           in the same condition and       He stood at crossroads,         curiously as scores of                            for the last so many days                                      at the donkey with the
           asked, ‘Why not open it and  clutching the letter in            others had done before,                           seemed mad; particularly         ‘I’m mad, mad.’ He looked     remark: ‘Eat this if you
           see, ask someone to read        his hand. He kept asking        smiled and said, ‘Go home                         the doll-making. ‘What          at his work-basket in a        like. It is a nice village .
           it?’ He threw up his arms in    everyone he came across,        and rest. You are not all                         sane man would make             corner, scooped out the        . .’ And he went out on
           horror. ‘Woman, you don’t       ‘Tell me, what is there in      right . . . Go, go home.’                         clay dolls after twenty         clay and made a helmet of      a second round. This
           know what you are saying.       this?’ but he would not                                                           five years of respectable       it and put it on his head.     was a quieter outing. He
           It cannot be opened. They       brook the suggestion             ‘Can’t you say what is                           service in an office?’ He       Ranged on the floor was        strode on at an even pace,
           have perhaps written that       to open it and see              in this?’ Singh asked                             felt a tremendous freedom       his latest handiwork. After    breathing deeply, with
           my pension is stopped, and  its contents.                       pathetically. The assistant                       of limbs, and didn’t feel       his last visit to the office   the clay helmet on, out of
           God knows what else the                                         took it in his hand,                              it possible to walk at an       he had been engaged in         which peeped his grey hair,
           Sahib has said . . .’           So forthwith Singh found        examined it and said, ‘Shall                      ordinary pace. He wanted        making a model village. It     his arms locked behind,
                                           his way to the City X-ray       I open it?’ ‘No, no, no,’                         to fly. He swung his arms       was a resplendent group:       his fingers clutching the
            ‘Why not go to the office      Institute at Race Course        Singh cried, and snatched                         up and down and ran on          a dun road, red tiles, green   fateful letter, his face
           and find out from them?’        Road. As he entered the         it back. There was a look                         with a whoop. He ran            coconut trees swaying,         tilted towards the sky. He
                                           gate he observed dozens         of terror in his eyes. The                        through the Market Road.        and the colour of the saris    walked down the Market
           ‘Not I! I will never show my    of cars parked along            assembly looked up from                           When people stood about         of the village women           Road, with a feeling that
           face there again,’ replied      the drive, and a Gurkha         their pages and watched                           and watched he cried, ‘Hey,     carrying water pots. He        he was the sole occupant
                                                                                                                                                                                            of this globe: his madness
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