Page 138 - The Circle of Life
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regard I assure you that the lawyer himself will tell you this. He knows he cannot
act for both sides once it is contested and will always (being a decent man in
nature) advise you to have the settlement checked out by someone else.
There are also mediators who you can use to reach settlement but it is not
required by law to do so. I have serious doubts on their use and where a party is
obnoxious it will be a waste of money. I really fail to see what they can provide
which your own lawyer cannot. It is not recommended and if the other side
wants a fight then give him one.
Fourthly there is always a sincere lack of information on the other side's financial
affairs and thus we would like to see copies of the bank statements, insurance
policies, pension funds and anything else which can determine the value of the
estate. Many hide these things on purpose or on traditional grounds where the
woman is excluded from financial affairs.
When should you leave the family home?
Some say never. You stay and the other spouse can go. It is good for the
children and does not disrupt their lives. This is usually the case where minors
are involved. The thing is that may not be realistic though it is often the husband
who leaves and the children stay with mom in the family house. There is no real
answer in law for it is something to be sorted out between the parties. No law
states you should leave or stay. Obviously it also depends whose house it is and
what you agreed to in your antenuptial. I found many who live on in the house
after divorce and whilst weird to me it worked for them.
Just make sure that if you leave that you take your stuff with you and make sure
you take only your own or agreed assets for the other spouse may well be
tempted to lay a charge of theft against you. In fact they often do. If you feel
threatened by your spouse you may ask and will receive police protection when
you fetch your assets. You may also obtain a protection order or interdict against
him and let me tell you the courts do not take kindly to people who ignores their
orders and will act very harshly and swiftly against those who do. It is not an
empty threat at all.
Pension funds?
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