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Recovery from low self–esteem
The recovery process to enhance self esteem may seem arduous, but it is worth every ounce of
your mental effort. You may have developed old habits which are hard to break. You have
fantasy dreams of the way things are supposed to be and these dreams die hard. The path of
recovery involves a lot of work and effort on your part. There are a lot of issues needing to be
addressed and a commitment to personal recovery is needed in order to keep the focus clear
and direct.
The first step in the recovery process is to address the distorted thinking, feelings, and behaviours
which resulted from the sources of your low self–esteem.
To correct your thinking, you will need to stand back from your life and beliefs to learn what
"normal'' is and to get in touch with what is reality in your life. You will need to dispel your
irrational beliefs. You will need to identify, discard, and replace negative self talk with daily
constructive affirmations. You will need to let go any intellectual opposition to the notion of a
Higher Power in your life. You will need to define a relationship between you and your Higher
Power that is healthy and works for you.
To heal your feelings you will need to identify and label your feelings. You will need to give
yourself permission to have both negative and positive feelings. You will need to get in touch
with how you are feeling about the reality in your life. You will need to feel the power of self
affirmation and self approval which results in your growing in self love and self caring. You will
need to open your feelings up to the healing of your Higher Power's will. You will need practice
in expressing feelings and listening to others expressing their feelings.

To change any unhealthy behaviours you will need to begin to act only on rational thinking and
true feelings, sincerely felt by you. Accept personal responsibility for your own actions and stop
blaming others. You will need to identify your self defeating behaviours and change them.

As a result of improved thinking, healed feelings, and healthy behaviours, your compulsively
driven behavioural pattern can change. This will occur by rewriting the old behavioural self talk,
taming your inner voice. Keep the positive elements of your personality and replace the
unhealthy aspects. You can change your old pattern by getting in touch with the feelings you
have for too long ignored. You can "let go'' of the compulsive nature of your old unhealthy
personality traits and work at thinking before you act. You can redefine yourself by letting go of
self defeating behaviours with their negative consequences.
As you work at rewriting and changing your old personality trait's self-talk, you also need to work
at addressing the problem areas identified in the earlier paragraphs on low self esteem.
The steps for recovery for each problem area is as follows:
· Let go of the unresolved grief over losses you have experienced in your life.

· Eliminate self destructive behaviours and gain outside support if necessary to ensure your
continued progress.
· Let go of the things you can’t control or change personally in life and accept self control
over your own behaviours and feelings.
· Release any unresolved anger appropriately - recognize that anger is a healthy feeling
with an appropriate place in your life.
· Learn how to focus more on feelings than on content to improve your communication skills,
by active listening, reflecting of feelings and problem solving based on the expression of
honest feelings.
· Let go of self–defeating behaviours and to adopt new, healthy behaviours by accepting
personal responsibility for self. Learn to embrace and welcome change.
· Work on improving personal behaviours so as to improve personal, work, and social
relationships.