Page 7 - The First 60 Days Magazine - February 2024

THE PATH TO REGULATION

AND CALMING RUNS

THROUGH RELATIONSHIPS

By Ira Hillman,

From: Elkhorn Collaborative

A portion of the article shares:

"The Link Between Relationships and the Brain

Our earliest relationships wire us for connection and re-connection. That is because co-regulation begins in utero
where our hearts and bodies send signals from the womb to our brains. After birth, our relationships continue to
influence our heart rate, breathing, and other body functions, which change our emotional energy and behavior.
Those crucial signals get transmitted to the brain via the autonomic nervous system. This is the language our body
uses to tell us how to feel and what to do.

“Caregiving interactions help build the infant’s capacity to love. The attentive loving behaviors grow the neural
networks that allow us to feel love, and then act in loving ways towards others. If you are loved, you learn to love.
Caring for the infant in this loving way also changes the brain of the caregiving adult. These interactions regulate
and reward both child and caregiver.”
— Dr. Bruce Perry in What Happened to You?

Human connections, especially our early interactions with those closest to us and responsible for our caregiving,
shape the trajectory of our lives. While adversity in childhood certainly affects future well-being, studies have
shown that safe, stable, and nurturing relationships can buffer the effects of adversity even in extreme cases,
paving the way for improved development and success in life.
The power of relationships continues beyond the early years of life. According to Dr. Perry, the repetition and
rhythm of sensory stimulation, like rocking a baby or walking with a friend holding hands, brings the body back to a
calm state that allows the brain to function most effectively.
Even when our lives are rich with relationships and connection, disconnection is part of every interaction and is
inevitable. From technology to pressures of daily life, distractions exist all around us. Moreover, people, no matter
how close they are to us, can ultimately say or do things that may push us away or alert our bodies of potential
danger or disagreement. This is why it is critical to remember that the states of emotional connection and
disconnection are not permanent.
Our brains and bodies can draw on the pattern of pairing emotional expression and shared
stimulation of our senses (e.g., soothing touch, eye contact, and deep listening) to reconnect
and restore a state of emotional connection time and again.

Read the full article:

Source: https://einhorncollaborative.org/the-path-to-regulation-and-calming-runs-through-relationships/

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